Main | Child's Play: Do Children Have a Sexual Self? - By Maya Ganesh »
Sexing the Mind
By Anusheh Hussain - 10:03 AM Monday 05 December 2005
I don’t know call me old fashioned but naked torso’s, bulging underwear and half naked bodies just don’t do it for me.
Okay, I admit, there was a time when we in South Asia were completely deprived of seeing scantily clad bodies so they were a bit of a novelty when it all started out. But over time sexy just seems to have degenerated into an over exposure of 24 inch waists, long naked legs, bare chests and close ups of male underwear.
Sexy used to mean intensity, mystery, chemistry (and good looks and a good body). There was a subtlety in the sexy of yore which gave it depth. It was more about sensuality, more about the suggested than the blatantly obvious. More about the complete package (mind, body, soul) than the size of ones breasts, chest or genitalia. Today it just seems like sexy has been reduced to how much you have, choose to expose and how long you are willing (and able) to gyrate on television.
There is an entire media industry out there, which is central to creating this definition of sexy. From Walls Ice Cream to VIP Underwear. All day we are being bombarded with their ideas of sexy. Not a problem if done with some responsibility towards their audience but a big problem when its done with little or no sense of creating healthy or holistic notions of the sexual.
Personally my own notion of sexy was of course influenced to some extent by cinema and television but because the media didn’t wield the kind of power then that it does now, I think the larger part of it still managed to rise out of my personal notions (and confusions of course) of sexuality. Albeit my definition of sexy has changed many times over the years, but I think I speak honestly when I say that it has always been influenced most by my internal state of being and not by what is being sold to me as sexy by someone out there.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not against ‘freedom’ of any kind. I believe everyone needs to make their own choices in life and then have the courage to live them. But what I wonder is whether this kind of rampant sexing of the mind in a really shallow way is actually robbing the young of making choices. Of their personal journey to understanding what sexuality is really all about when you address it in the dark corners of your own being. Of the right to create their own idea of sexy and to be able to live it then fearlessly.
When society begins to dictate personal standards and ways of being to us there is enormous pressure to conform. And if one is unable to conform then it requires immense courage to transcend. I hope that we have gifted our young with the ability to discern the superficial from the innate, to make their own choices and to live their own truths. I hope that sexy runs deep within each one of us as the flow of our own unique spirit and identity.
Posted By Anusheh Hussain - 10:03 AM Monday 05 December 2005
Comments
Hi Anusheh
If you think that all our 'sexing' is hapenin from these ads then what woud happen if there is no ads an media roles? I mean woud we have some other ideaof 'sexy', like one that is totally somewher else and no one knows what sexy is coz I think this way we all have a standard. Like Maya's articl sez everyone has their own idea too, then how come the ad worl makes it seem like so? I don't really know whats wrong with ad sexy? Its fine that why its so poplar. No?
Posted by
I agree with you Anusheh. I like to read your artiles in future also.
take care.
Posted by on December 13, 2005 04:16 PM
Sunanda
Welcome to the Blog! Looking forward to hearing more from you.
Best
Anusheh
Posted by
just read this one...nice perspective..while one has no control over the external world, one can re-orient our perceptions by centering ourselves...
Posted by on January 1, 2006 10:27 AM
Well everyone has a right to express in this country but if we sit back and ponder over the so called "sexy potryal" of ice creams,under wears and the naked torso,we realise that its not just about freedom of expression but blatant portayal of sex with a "tadka"(element) of pornography.
There are times when I often wonder about people talking against bar girls who supposedly show their torso and dance in front of a bunch of male chauvinist pigs who inadvertently feel a sense of control and power over women by throwuing money at them. But if you actually see the other side of the coin, bar dancers work hard and earn money to support their family. Why do we target them and not the so called actors/models who star in pornographic advertisements, perform on stage, coz at the end of the day you are also dancing in front of a crowd who has paid money to watch you perform.
There is nothing wrong with 'sexy ads'.... if you would like to term it that..... but then dont have double standards.... you conform to one but condone the other.
Posted by
"bar dancers work hard" reminded me of this wonderful story of how Ramakrishna went and touched the feet of a prostitute in reverence because he said that she was the one who took all of mens filth and cleansed it and so she was truly worthy of worship. (Sorry dont remember it verbatim but this was the gist.)
Posted by
I completely agree with you Anusheh i believe that nowadays all products are using sexual dispalys in order to distribute their products
Lahore,Pakistan
Posted by
Hi Anusheh
Its kind of weird addressing someone by your own name isnt it?:-)For a second I thought I'd commented on this article by mistake:-)
Posted by
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Great article. It doesnt do it for me either and I have been waiting for someone to talk about all this nonsense that has been happening for so long. Its disgusting, how Walls ice cream advertises itself. My children go to the small kiosks and there are these sexually perverted posters hanging there. I have been trying to move my children off from Walls but how much can you shelter them. This kind of perversion is everywhere.