this should be a very welcome series, jasjit..and what a completion to this post...very insightful..tx..

"Memories which swirl as the seas of our emotional turpitude, drowning us in alien depths and spitting us out on even more alien shores".

Jasjit you have articulated this so beautifully. Poetic, poignant and so vivid. Love the way words flow through you.

love
anusheh

jasjit,

its so sad to see a young girl with dreams in her eyes bening abused like that by her own friends and after that being misunderstood by her loved ones.

her question also is very stinging...true how come a modern girl with broad outlooks and jest for life feel such?....i think again the notion of conditioning the female child that she is weak and helpless sicne childhood is the main culprit.

rape/sexual abuse is seen as an irreparable damage to ones dignity by the hypocritic society. why does a society label a girl child who has been abused as fallen? this notion is also carried by every woman and when the said happens to them they are devastated.

only when the deep rooted conditioning is weeded out and people see sexual abuse as a crime by the criminal and not the shame of the victim that we can truly eveolve into a better society.

Jasjit,

“What’s wrong with me? I am a modern, intelligent, informed girl. And yet I just can’t get over this. Why?”

Modernity has brought us a long way but when it comes to dealing with our traumas this very modernity seems like a burden.

My mind is telling me I am modern, I am aware of my sexuality, I am not going to be intimidated, I am strong, I might be hurt but I'm not going to breakdown and halt my life if I find myself in a situation where I have been emotionally or physically violated.

But in my heart I just can't deal with it. I can't put up the brave front that as a modern girl I thought I would be able to. I can't let others know of my suffering because thats not what a modern girl does.

This dilemma just crushes us from inside.

How does one solve this dilemma?

Ditto Anusheh... how superbly your words flow Jasjit and how beautifully they communicate and connect to so many of us. Thank you!

There's so much to say, yet I am unable to find words. Girls and women go through much of their lifetimes burying and repressing the pain, the trauma, fear and insecurities. And alwyas the guilt - that somehow it was always our fault, we allowed it to happen, we asked for it, we behaved improperly, simply always our fault. Then children and child sexual abuse - rampant and debilitating..Sexual abuse is enveloped by shrouds, and we are so afraid to cut through the shrouds.

out of the four phases of human development, the second phase is the phase of emotions, where the ego slowly begins to form (the swirl in the general flow within will slowly begin to create a center and that is the'point' of the ego), and the third phase is the phase of intellect, where ego eventually gets to its peak. just as in the fourth phase it again gets transcended (swirl again dissipates and slowly merges with the general flow).

progress from second to third, from being emotional creatures to intellectual creatures takes place when, because of suffering of one kind or the other, people begin to ask questions. just as the girl of the above story is now asking in the words of 'why', how'. this process, once begun, will eventually lead them to the questions of how and why of existence itself along with the full development of the ego.

over all homo sapiens are the product of the third phase of the cycle of species. however, further within, women are the creatures of the second phase, the phase of emotions, and the men are of the third phase, the phase of intellect.

now women are difficult to 'handle' according to jasjit's words in a previous thread, because they or their problems have yet not crystallised into a single 'point' of the ego. they are rather in the form of a forming swirl. men's, on the other hand, are more easy if their ego is handled just because they or all their problems have now crystallised in the ego 'point' and once it is handled, they immediately see the normal or natural or flowing picture and in the light of that their problems and solutions. in fact their problems get simultaneously resolved with the 'handling' of their ego.

these patterns have been going on in phases-comprising cycles ever since big bang and we do not have much say in them. so the best formula is 'this too shall pass.' as they say, time is the greatest doctor.

Dear Jasjit,

I think your article will touch every woman at a point, which has always been hidden from us. It's hard to pinpoint who or what is making the 'modern woman' so insecure of her own identity.

Is it the society or the family or the entire misconception of being an 'Indian Woman'? A woman who is expected to be actually a 10 handed goddess who can only be 'evoked' as a tigress 'when needed'. Otherwise her assertive self is supposed to purr under the feet of the patriarchal society.

Most people tend to associate the term "modern" with clothes and language. Very few will actually respect that modernity has to do with attitude, mentality and most importantly 'personal choices.'

And most of the times, the term 'Modern' has a direct link with a person's choice of projecting his/her sexuality.

Being modern, wearing western clothes, or listening to western music and being comfortable with my sexuality doesn't necessarily mean that I would have no choices in my life regarding my sexuality.

It's a collective problem, which each woman fights on her own. And probably the fact that each of us become an island during this that we suffer such trauma, as why me? Why now? when I am moving towards emancipation?

When the entire society is rooting for a 21st century woman why is this non acceptance of the modern woman.

Anandi challenged her immediate society that she has a choice to be independent and not conform to a certain type of girls as her friends. Then again after her traumatic experience, she couldn't be the type, which conformed to her parents' image.

It's always difficult to swim against the tide. Whoever tried it has become a square peg. In the mirror there are two reflections. One ruled by the world, one by the family.

Both at extremes and leave very little choice for the individual. You are right -- It is truly a split between the Yang and Yin. Not just physical aggression but emotional aggression is suppressing the softer more gentler and feelings of our mind.

harb, while i am able to appreciate your drift...how do you look at choices in this context on the basis of your perspective...events which crumble and destroy one are opportunities for another...

some interesting shares here....the "modern" woman , another stereotyping, another projected ideal with a mad rush to conform...and lose one's centering...and consequently become more vulnerable...

personally, i see no option to stepping back and observing oneself, for starters..abilities to observe are functions of energy and consciousness levels and various pranayams, yoga and other spiritual centering practices can come in handy...

sundar, the story of evolution through cycles and phases moves on two feet or in two layers. the bottom or basic layer moves as per a design and we have no say in it, no choices. it is because of this that we move from childhood to youth to middle age to old age without our having any say in them. but what we wil do then in each phase, obviously circumscrbed at the bottom of each phases's peculiarities, will depend upon our choices. we cannot do in terms of our nature but we can do much in terms of nurture, though our natures brought the complementing nurtures when coming into the world of manifestation.

dilemma of the modern woman, and even man:

some decades back we were in the third phase of the cycle of global culture as a whole. we were in what was rightly called the age of reason (A history of Westrn philosophy by B.Russel). women in general were in their second phase and thus wholly women and men in third third phase and thus wholly men.

then culture as a whole began to enter the fourth phase. women began to enter their next phase, the third phase, the phase otherwise of men, and began to behave like men just as what a typical modern woman behaves like. yet from their basic phase they were women.

similarly, men began to enter their next, the fourth phase, the phase of going beyond ego, the phase where he will become progressively androgenous. and yet again, basically he is man because of his basic third phase.

with the result that whenever a women like chaitali encounters some tough problem she falls back on her heart though finds that she is yet not able to handle the problem from there (the problem she now faces is really a problem which can only be handled by a strong ego or finally by man.

similarly, men like harb the saint, though put themselves up as saint because of their having transcended the third phase and entered the fourth, yet immediately fall back on their ego when faced with a situation which will really invok their androgenous state (perhaps jasjit's bodhisattavic state?). most modern saints may be like this though harb becasue of this very knowledge has not put himself as one, it is rather being forced upon him here.

i just came here for the company of women to borrow the phrase from Khushwant Singh's book lol.

tx for those shares , harb..fascinating...

thanks sundar for being in the 'room'...

harb, the egotist.

hey harb, am doing some articles for some global posting..keep coming back here...now and then....hows the old monk"ey" doing?

old monkey is doing what you are seeing on the blog...writing...what else...great play with words...

btw, what do you do with your yang in such wintery nights lol.

i dont do much , harb...i am a boring guy, a sound sleeper even without old monks...and i am in mumbai...we dont have chilly winters here!!!!

Thanks Harb for figuring out my Phase.

But just out of curiosity I want to know why does all male bonding rest on such sexual innuendo?

will you explain, chaitali? I cant understand...i am not much read in english. what male bonding and on what sexual innuendo?

Sangeeta Welcome to the blog

Your eloquent and insightful questions have set me thinking of how deeply the schism affects women today. Let's see if we can all go a little deeper and look for some answers.

Chaitali & Aachi

Adressing some of your queries here too. while I think the sexual is indeed a tough one to overcome I think as in the case of Anandi the question really lies in identifying the underbelly of the schism. I think largely 'modern' women in South Asia have crossed the barrier of looking at 'virginity' and body as sacred gates, where 'violation' can damn them to hell. However I think the residue of the experience had pinned Anandi down on three critical levels of self-perception:

a) In the context of an identity, women who are literate, with largely modern parents feel they have escaped the 'second sex' syndrome. The problem lies in the fact that they are 'aware' of this escape. Let me explain it in terms of say Sati. As a practice it dates so far in gender memory that a widow today will probably laugh in the face of someone even suggesting that it could be her fate. At a personal level, she can never identify with that threat. Women's emergence into a world of 'unconditional' choices is recent and evolving. Women who 'break free' are aware of the ambient struggle as well as the 'threat' of being subsumed by it. For Anandi then the words she heard her parents use in berating a daughter's vulnerability, morality etc were like a tidal wave. Not because she couldn't understand the pressure/context in which they were spoken. BUT because she looks upon her parents ( as do other women in her situation) as her foundational fortress of identity sculpting, in that moment they suddenly become part of an echo which wanders all the way back in time, possibly also connecting to some whispered fears of her mother about preferring a son in the womb. The echo strikes at a gut fear (which modern woman never sit down to identify and purge) and the shattering is intense as is the feeling of betrayal. Women/men anyone choosing to walk on untrodden grounds need to tune into their gut fears for they are deep, lacerating, have the power of a tidal wave and strike when least expected only because we have never sat down to identify them.

2) Her second shock was the betrayal of 'friendship' and the warped sexual plays of unresolved friends which could lead to life-threatening situations. This is not such a big one and she was well on the mend with this, clear that it had taught her some valuable lessons.

3) Finally the last one is again a sticky one. Shorn of the 'izzat' loss and great sanctum of virginity destroyed, sexal aggression in today's context brings out an acute (and kind of undefinable) sense of violation of boundaries. Speech and action both have this power to create a feeling of being doused by some filthy, sticky garbage which will wash with great effort. The memory of a sexually agressive touch can take a long time to heal and needs attentive work. Once again I feel the root lies somewhere deeper in gender memory. Interestingly even as I have watched women emerge from the trauma at an emotional/intellectual level, rape leaves a deep scar on physical memory. Intimacy is critically affected by such a memory and indeed leaves after a long long time.

In summation, 'modern' woman looks to her rational, intellectual, and articulation powers as her weapons of Mastery. She forgets the heart full of fears carrying in its most silent corners the legacy of turgid emotional bundles. When she falls she thinks(shattered by that thought too) that she is emotionally weak, too soft as she has always feared. Indeed not! She is only emotionally untravelled and unskilled in knowing her own depths. In the great march of the modern woman she jumped in the forefront of the mind's hit parade, compulsive to make it to the 'top'. She forgets that at her heels lie the ominous echoes of an inner universe, which if not heard/known and mastered has the power to drown her in waves of a self-created ignominy whose depths are immeasurable.

Sundar,

I think you directly hit the nail on what I meant.

i quote "the "modern" woman , another stereotyping, another projected ideal with a mad rush to conform...and lose one's centering...and consequently become more vulnerable..."

It's true actually if you the modernisation of the man as such was not linked to his character so much as it is to the woman's. For decades women have been expected to fit into moulds of characters and roles.

Naturally as a woman of today 'I' (as in woman) some times feel as if 'I' am walking barefoot on a thin rope with no bamboo to balance or no net support beneath me. Actually the minute 'I' choose to be modern I some how give my more traditional parents and friends & family a feeling that 'I' am a deserter.

Where as the minute 'I' am into the modern world 'I' am once again expected to do certain things and behave in a certain way. If 'I' don't then of course 'I' provoke that 'I' am a misfit there as well.

It's a very difficult ball game and believe me it doesn't help to meditate or do yoga.
Probably what we need is a stronger support system outside the family...

More like minded friends, forums, discussions, meets for women, even blogs like this, movies and theatre and other ways where the lone woman comes in contact with others with the same feelings.

I think the best word to describe is in Hindi, "kashmakash"... it's a very internal process to accept oneself as a modern person and love one self rather than fitting a role.

Harb

Hi.Your posts have brought up some thoughts. Even though I have to admit that the phase theory manages to confuse me let me share some insights on what you say.

Your 'point' theory is very pertinent because I think by its nature it explains much in human nature per se. A point being easier to identify, tackle and pierce while swirling waves by nature tend to 'drown' and 'overwhelm'. But I feel that the masculine and feminine are o.k when one looks at them as a gender in your theory. The more complex one is when they are flowing as two streams within us as men and women and therein lies the real challenge.

As you rightly say, after the emotional phase comes the mind phase because it helps create a sense of control. I think this is the same formula for men and women. For instance childhood is a heart phase for us all. Hurt/shattered/confused/suppressed/abused etc in childhood we all take those fragments and develop clear mind patterns to deal with them (whether men or women). Unfortunately, as the second phase of our lives moves us all into more mental states we soon forget that the mind (games is a word I would consciously use here) we have created has in its wake some fierce emotional scars/anger. We begin to identify with this mind and so on and so forth.

Now the two streams flow in us unabated. In men (not all men) the emotional Yin side is constricted and narrowed to a 'mangeable' force and in many women the same is true. In other women the emotional flows like a wild river, driving them to distraction and their mind is just a thin veil of management techniques which is neither healthy, nor creative nor expansive. It is just a kind of shrewd, artifice with which they 'cope'.

The question is that both men/women have to look at what is happening in the Yin since the Yang has risen purely in reaction to it, i.e their mind will reflect the health/sickness of their Yin. As an example I have seen some men raised by strong or singular female models have a very twisted feminine within unless the female role models were outstandingly autonomous and strong in a 'healthy' way. The Yin of these men is manipulative, into ugly game playing and learns the language of 'sensitivity' etc to perpetuate artifice. Strangely many men raised/surrounded by women carry a hidden misogyny which is again very destructive.

I feel we have all absorbed the masc/fem conditioning into us as we grow and both genders carry it, manifesting it differently again becaue gender roles have been defined so differently in our world. In the inner current of our beings the difference is not so real only the intensity may swing distinctly. and both genders need to heed to the current of their Yin and their Yang, cleansing and freeing both to ensure a balanced mind/body/spirit

Tx for that response, Sangeeta...i share in all humility as a fellow human...and do hope it enables some breakthroughs for you...jasjit;s awesome share which has just preceded should serve as a critical eye-opener in viewing the "modernity" as juxtaposed with the concurrent vulnerabilities...

Understanding a problem is the key to its solution.when you can see that centering gets lost when one is driven by external parameters, staying in that awareness would enable a lot of personal gates to open out.Awareness is not a means to freedom from restrictive spaces, it is the seeds of the freedom itself.freedom is an inner world experience which would find manifest in outer world spaces.awareness enables the freeing of spaces within.

trust me, losing centerdness is as regular a feature with guys as with women...i recently have been working with a male friend of mine who has been diagnosed with "anxiety neurosis"...He is a high achiever and very uncomfortable with the lifestyle demands on him, which he sees as a corporate requirement..he has actually changed jobs to cope up but it is hardly a solution...

Yoga, meditation...personally i feel the potency of these have been diluted due to a lack of awareness of them with soem teachers themselves...personally, i feel, India's greatest contribution to the world is teh discovery that breath, mind and kundalini are interconnected...mind and kundalini cannot be controlled..any attempt only leads to resurgences out fo suppressions...however, breath can be controlled...even when we are angry, just focussing on breath helps us to calm down...the manifestation of anger is accompanied by non-rhythmic breathing; as soon as we focus our awareness on breath, the rhythm is back; we dont have to do anything...just the awareness enables it...
meditation to me, is an enabled state of awareness...which keeps growing in its abilities to see...
sangeeta, external mechanisms can help to avery limited extent; it is a management mechanism, cosmetic and superficial,,we have to move away from management mechanisms to release mechanisms...and personally, i see awareness being the key...we are trained to put effort for manifesting solutions...but the inner world demands active passivity in awareness, then solutions emerge in realms of manifests...
just stay with your suffocation...do not try to escape it...in my experience, it has the capacity to work wonders..

jasjit, :)

very enlightening post, Jasjit!

It's funny, but the past 24 hours, 4 women emailed me to come to their rescue, being sexually and man-handled verbally abused on a blog. Oh, guess where?

All four stopped posting there because of men begging for their pictures, and lewd flirting remarks whether married or not. They didn't know what to do to defend themselves??

Naturally, I went and helped, because I am against any form of abusive in its many ways; and i"m not afraid to walk into a room to settle down a bunch of rowdies(trouble-makers)

Naturally, now that the help was delivered; the heat taken off them, I am being begged/told to "let it go" and the direction is turned then, on me there in a bad way?

I feel "so manipulated."

lol

I think, next time anyone needs my strength; I will give it to them instead, in a bowl.

North

jasjit,thats an interesting post...while confessing i do not know much about yin and yang, can you please indicate how one explores the yin spaces elaborately...i have been brought up by my mom and while i feel i have explored that relationship space extensively and effected healings I would like to know from your strategic perspective if there is any way i can explore that space more....I do view myself as a "sensitive" person...but from your perspectives on the matter, I would like to explore if i am into some elaborate games deep down...from my yin spaces...using processes of awareness and self exploration i know, I have been looking into the matter...

you know, sangeeta, as I speak from the "other" side of the gender divide,"modernity", to me, is more about one's ability to accept oneself for the unique creatures we are...i feel teh other part that you mention is the critical area of addressal...deep down, both as men and women, we are not able to accept ourselves, we resent ourselves...we dont like the way we look or the way we are...and this aspect has in it the seeds of the loss of our self esteem...again, just being aware of our self-hate opens up a lot of doors...we dont need to do anything about it; that will defeat the purpose...if we are able to see our self-rejection and hate completely, it opens up healing and freedom...

Dear North

I would say to you that we need to be constantly aware of our own projections especially when we are about to leap into a war (and when we think it is to defend someone else). In all likelihood the war moves/attracts us because it reflects an inner war, and in this case the war between our own feminine/masculine. Say if you turned the whole perspective around just for a moment and looked at whether your own feminine is lashing out at the masculine within for having supressed/undermined/undervalued it for so long what you hear within might well stun you. If you read my piece carefully I am referring to what lies unresolved within us, especially as gender memory within women. attached to it is our own sense of impoverishment IN OUR OWN EYES. If that battle lies unaddressed, what can there be but situations which externally keep pointing to that inner truth.

As for me, Intent has been an impeccable place to just learn about me. Every act, word, experience there and my response to it helped me go deeper within. You see for me it was an 'uncontested sacred space'. So whatever I 'received' there was just for me.

Hope this helps
Love

Good Morning Sundar

Your experience of self examination is vast(in your own words) as is your skill to help others with their inner truths. In such a case you are adept at being your own Master and given that you are constantly engaged in 'self-awareness and exploration' you will discover best for yourself all you need to about the patterns of your Yin.

Good Luck

good morning, jasjit...i trust my processes would lead me in the direction of learnings that i need for my evolutions...tx..

sundar,

beyond a certain phase the yin goes latent in the yang. then all you have to do is to just be 'actively passive' to use your own words .

then comes the next phase. in which you my let go even of this 'active' thing. just let passivity reign.

finally you will remain neither yin nor yang, though you will not remain aware of it, you will just be. to be one is not to remain two - the yin and the yang. or perhap then you will be aware of it but which is beyond words, beyond descriptions.

hi jasjit!

tx for that perspective , harb...

Good Morning everyone!

Jasjit, Sundar, Harb,

The struggle with 'Gender memory'- I was wondering whether this is happening for men too these days. I have often read in men's magazines letters from men trying to seek soultions about what is the 'right' sexuality for them. Here by sexuality they mean what should be the nature of their behaviour at the emotional level within a relationship.

When I read these letters I get the feeling that men too are caught in their gender memory, which is dominated by the Yang. The modern man too is going through a swirl of emotions as his woman counterpart.

ur note to north is very beautifully expressed, jasjit....tx.

hi annie,personally, i see no reason why it should be any differeant, except maybe in realms of manifest...i see the body itself a mind construct...and "beyond" to me is the domain beyond all these memories...the reality underlying all the conceptual manifests...

Good Morning Annie

Excellent point! Perhaps this discussion now needs a piece on the subject which I promise to write soon.

love

yes Annie, it is so true about guys that they really do struggle with emotional venting when intimate with a girl. I know of guys who say "am i becoming too emotional?" as if feeling extremely guilty for expressing their emotions.

i guess it all comes from the gender stereotype of "men are supposed to only THINK and not FEEL", "men are macho and emotional means weak", or "men dont cry" etc. etc. ....

wonder when all this will go away.

looking forward to that piece jasjit :)

hi annie and all!

it is again the phase thing. women are leaving their basic, emotional phase and entering the ego or intellectual phase, while men are leaving their basic, ego phase and entering the intuitive or deeper-emotional phase.

so men, who till now identified themselves with their ego now find it difficult to find/fix their identity. and to further compound the problem, as each phase further goes through four phases of senses, emotions, intellect and intelligence, he is again being caught in the second, emotional phase of this fourth phase, hence into the swirl of emotions in other words.

the fourth phase is just like the second phase but operates at the far deeper or subtle level. here emotions towards particulars will give place to emotions for the general, in other words, passion for a particulr individual will give place to compassion for people in general.

thats very perceptive, shalini..tx...everyone without exception struggles with images they have to live upto....until they see the images as nothing but images far removed from their realities...mixture of insecurity, fear and the need to conform...i have had occasion to meet some real big underworld dons in the course of my life and their vulnerability has been tangible...the aggressiveness and show of apparent confidence has to be merely scrathced before the image crumbles...

and harb,the phase-loopist , tx for that share...

sundar, now guess what image i have to live up to...

yeah harb...can empathize...thats like a designer cross in evolution realms...seems like having climbed 13 floors of a building arduously only to discover that a piece of baggage has been left behind inadverdantly...with no offence meant, do you still see yourself as a learner?

harb,i asked that q bcos while the phase loops can help explain a situation, it does not mitigate the real-time misery that you have to experience...

anusheh, since you said that we all are grown up here and nobody will mind if i say something about female/male, i will dare to tell you something interesting in this connection.

on the long line of evolution we have evolved from clay to minerals to plants to animals to primates to man...

in it, in a greatly simplified version, the one first splits into two, the inner world and the outer world, and then the inner world tries to come out or up again step by step to catch the outer world, to merge indistinguishably with it once again and so become one again.

an other way of saying it is that the inner world first threw/produced the outer world out of it and then, since then it is its whole endeavor to come up or out to unite with it and become one or whole again.

now keeping the whole above evolution from clay to minerals to plants to animals to primates to man in mind let us see how what i have said above has manifested itself in all the above in reality.

in clay the inner world is yet indistinguishable. it is in the form of undefinable spirit underneath. in mineral the inner world though yet fully concealed has become a bit manifest as scientists have dicovered it in some way and call it the anti-or virtual mineral.

so let us say that from going from clay to minerals the inner world has transformed itself from being totlly indistinguishable or totally invisible to becoming anti-or virtual world.

then as minerals evolved into plants, the fully concealed or dormant anti-world came up or became visible a bit and in the process became plants roots. here then, one can see both the worlds - roots and the plant. here what is in the root directs what is to be in the plants.

as plants then evolved further to animals, the inner world in the forms of roots further came up (to unite with the outer world) and in the process became animals tails. so the saying that tail wags the dog is not really a figment of people's imagination.

then as the animals further evolved to become primates, the inner world further went up and became one with primates' now hind body (see, primates have no tails). now, while the inner world has now gone latnt in the outr world of he primate it yet shws itself in hair now having grown on primate's body.

anyway, when the evolution further progressed from primates to homo sapiens, it first made woman of them and in the process the inner world here metamorphosed into woman's tail or braid. this is in fact the reason most of the women keep braids. and this is the reason the saying goes that the wisdom of women lies in her braid.

anyway, as evolution further progressed the outer world evolved to become man now and the inner world became almost fully one with him in the form of his head/brain/mind. in other words, the inner world has now almost fully united with man, though really not fully since he yet considers his mind and body two different things.

anyway, no wonder women who are on the cutting edge of evolution tend to cut their hair because from within they have already begin to become man. it is because of some inner urge and not just because they choose it like that out of the blue or something like that.

Maharshi's, sages, are supposed to be evolved still further than man and their keeping long beards now may be taken as the sign that now they have conquered the inner world or mind and rather than be diected by it 'isnu aage la laya hai'and so rather they direct it now. that is, now mind is in their control rather than the other way around.

lol, now nothing to mind, just my perspective, read it if for nothig else just for your entertainment. but yet think why certain women apparently more evolved within women tend to cut their hair like men and why many of the modern women now.

if something look wrong, sorry in advance. i barked up the wrong tree.

if anybody wants to see it in the picture form go to my wite www.selfdesigneduniverse.com and look at fig number 3 or perhaps 4...

i wrote this with no malicious intent just for the sake of your knowledge and so i hope now you will stand up to your promise of being grown up and not taking it personally.

knowledge/understanding in one way or the other helps in mitigating the real time misery...none can deny it, if it were not so we would never have embrked on the path of knowledge through science, philosophy mysticism.

and no, i no longer consider myself a learner if you will excuse my presumtuousness. of course one can always increase one's knowledge of details which really is information not knowledge or learning.

no hassles harb, respect your perspectives....

Harb

I dont quite know what to make of this but thanks for the effort :-).

love
anusheh

no problem anusheh, since an interaction with you triggered this thought I had to get rid of it. that is all.

love. Harb

Dear Jasjit; your response completely opened my eyes to a definite, suppressed issue. I DO defend helpless women who ask; and I see now, in being a defender, I attract the scearios.

IS this how the law of attraction works?

I am so new to the idea of mind-construct; because I have without a doubt; been quite timed with de-constructing as much as I can, with every blemish getting accute attention(gentle smiles.)

Yes, I see my quite more clearer; and Jasjit, are you ever wrong(silly smiles.)

Jasjit, in closing this response; why would I feel so let-down; when the women whom pleaded for my intervention; did not show up to help themselve's? I found this was the same, when I was the "Auntie" to everyone while living in the projects. lol kids knew me as "cookie lady." I never seen so many hungry kids, in such a rich country in such small spaces. whew!

I suppose, I have a lot of memory to erase; with ME< being the inevitable eraser? lol

North

oh my, just now, I had a flash-vision of ME, as a homeless child(yes, for summer) hungry, cold; but having fun too, on the adventure. IT was not until I was a little older, I realized I was less valued as a being; I didn't think I was; but society sure let me know I was.

AM I still struggling Jasjit; to free myself from the bondage of impovershed "thinking" which in lieu, keeps me poor, not only in spirit, but environmentally?

North

Dearest North

You have always amazed me in the way you connect the dots so quickly and are able to peer within to where the core lies. All you now need to do is go deeper ino those places and let the light in. And for that indeed some serious tinkering needs to be done with the patterns of the mind. Trust me, the greatest pointer in life is to look upon all that is heppening outside as a reflection of what is happening within.

If I may suggest I think the first thing is to wipe out the feeling/memory/perception of poverty. This is hard work but if there's anyone who can do it buddy, its you. Remember whose ever cause you feel pulled to champion, just stop and take a deep breath and know somewhere that it is in fact little North asking for attention within. Once she feels she has priority in your life an abundance will flow within you like a force which may well take your breath away.

Will be sending you a long e-mail tomorrow. Have been sending Reiki for the last few days.

Love and hugs

And North

Sorry, to answer your question on the law of attraction, it is a hundred percent accurate law. Everything happening outside, even the tiniest things like the birds that visit the tree outside your house, what happens if your post does not immediately show up on intent, whom you consider friends/adversaries on Intent, what happens to your car when it is out of order, gets a flat tire or loses a light etc, and of course all our phyiscal ailments etc etc. The messages become sharper and more accurate when you start the mind practice of surrendering to you environment and letting it guide you. Having experienced it at a particular stage of my process I can only say its mind blowing.

Intent came into your life primarily because healing is karmically just a doorstep away. All that happens there is a sacred message.

Love

Dear Jasjit, glad my efforts to self-improve was noticed(giggles) yes perhaps, because i AM aware of so many things(age-wisdom?); sometimes, too much at once comes blowing IN; and its mindboggling. So, I have been following your instructions, and able to see things clearer in some respects.

I see me now, as denying I'm in pain.

Thanks Jasjit

North

..surrendering to your environment and let it guide you...beautiful words...staying with the flow and trusting it...as events surface to teach us what we have to learn...joyfully seeing oneself learning every moment...

hi everybody, good morning!

and north, besides what jasjit hs said, dont extoll the virtures of poverty untill poverty is removed.

hi sundar, hope all is well in the mental as well as menifest spaces...

gm harb, spiritual and men-infest spaces are in fine tuning...mental spaces are active as i have a professional presentation coming up....

Good Morning Harb

thank you for the 'mat in the guth' explanation LOL!

LOL!

some time back an american friend of mine asked me what do you mean by lol. i said i am not very net savvy but i know of only one meaning of it and that is 'laughing out loud'. she said we say it for lots of love. i was a bit confused. then the compromise ws arrived that if we will say lol it will mean laughing out loud but if we will say LOL it will mean lots of love. now which one is yours jasjit lol!

and to which one of posts your post appled, to the longer ones above or the shorter one addressed to north? i think it applies to longer one?? LOL

O.k Harb lol it is

And I was referring to your explanation for "aurtan di mat guth vich hai!" And since they will never be blessed with long beards (thank God!) they will never have the mind before them i guess!!1

why, as all moves in cycles, the next time the men will become women and the women, men...it is final balanced vision isko samajhke houme kahe na koi. lol vi te LOL vi.

jasjit, i am sending my book to you today. i think you can do full justice to it though for some scientific terms you may have to take the help of a dictionary.

the whole soul's journey comprises of our going from what may be called spiritual heart to naval to physical heart to head to again back to spiritual heart. in the process it gets entanlged into senses (naval), emotions (heart), concepts (head or mind)and finally spirituality or compassion etc. it suffers in all and in the process outgrows all. this is its whole journey and at the bottom is based wholly on science.

hystria in women happens when a women has evolved enough to leave the heart center but yet not enough to cross the throat and reach the head center.

similarly, schizophrenia in men happens when a man has evolved enough to leave the head center but yet not enough - or has yet not become fine enough - to reach the spiritual heart-center.

slowly, with the advancement of Age as a whole the women will automatically have gone across the throat at the bottom of their beings and thus the incidents of hysteria wil begin to wane on their own. similarly, incidents of schizophrenia in the case of men will begin to wane. and in fact, because of wheels within wheels character of evolution's progress scientists have observed this fact - that incidents of hysteria and schizophrenia at some point of time automatically begin to go away at mass levels.

in the meantime women will have to do with going through all the four phases of their own second phase and men through all the four phases of their own third phase. with the result that a jasjit....a harb...

no wonder in the last phases of their second and third phases in which they now really are they will be much alike...

hope you will khoj some truth in these sabads.

if so let me know..

harb.

PS: lol, from 'mat in the guth' i thought you were refering to matter in the gut and from there thoughts about hysteria and schizophrenia came to mind...one thing leading to an other ...dont know i want to unload or you want to learn...

anyway, rest assured, for me neither men are men nor women are women...all mile stones on the wheel of evolution, includng even plants and animals...

i send you all the respect i am capable of and in fact to all other women here. we are a caravan on the march of evolution some ahead some behind...none less special none more special...on the front today are in the rear tomorrow and in the rear today are on the front tomorrow...what is there mor to say...beyond this timeless, eternal description of things...

who is male and who is female in this eternal dance of energy and matter...sit in its center identifying with the SOUL and just ENJOY....SILENCE...

Harb Ji

Thank You for the book I look forward to reading it. And for what I may not understand I hope I can write and ask for a clarification.

Agree with you on all counts- in the final picture there is nothing but being and all will get there in the final analysis. Here's some haunting lines from Gurbaani I love- "Door des ek jogi baise, naar na purakh kaho ko kaise."

LOL & lol

now jasjit what more to say except to carry on the play, in which just for the sake of its going on, some lines will seem to be on one side and some on the other...

PLAYFULLNESS!

lol, you have won the race. i thought if jasjit does not say LOl i will stop writing now...not beause of some narajagi but just that perhaps it may the time...but before i could write it i saw your post and there as LOL. I can sit in the center but without this LOL things what is to move around me does not move...you have many chelian aroud you but i have none...back to the basics...

Harb

PS: i had in fact put the book in the envelope yesterday and written the addrss but then just could not send the man to the post office. perhaps it needed todays's posts before sending it. now i will do it...

Harb, sorry to pout, but I'm still waiting for my copy(wink) did your nephew send it yet or, do I wait with empty enthusiasm? lol

North

north, lol, there could be some delay but empty enthusiasm, never. even jasjit had to wait for about two weeks. i have written to my nephew some five days back and i am just sending him the reminding email.

Harb

Thanks Harb, it will give me great insight to your vision; and will help in the greater design of things(smiles.)

Jasjit, does this count as 2?(smiles.)

North

Indeed North
Good Morning to you

It counts as 2 but if you are aware it counts as none.

love

happy lohri to all of you...for us from teh south of india too, this is a month of gr8 celebrations...tyagaraja aradhanas, worship and tribute in melody and rhythmn to teh saint-poet tyagaraja, are all over the place; pongal and makar sankranti are round the corner...tomorrow....as jasjit made that post on gratitude, the saint poets of teh south, tyagaraja, purandaradasa, Bhadrachalam ramdas come to mind...how enriched our lives have become through them as through andal and meera who got teh madhur rasa into bhakti spaces..