wow..what a closure to that post...pain, to understand the energy, to creatively use it and to finally transcend...an invaluable teacher in our lives...blessings in disguise...not trying to glamoourise pain, but resenting it blocks our learning...

What a piece of writing Jasjit!

True, we come to understand the wisdom of the holy books as we evolve enough to understand them.

Pain is there to make you die to your previous small self so as to enble you to now be born to a greater self. A drop of water in a sea will have to die to its self of a drop to be a self of a sea.

Love. Harb.

Absolutely wonderful Jasjit

I must again applaud for the wonderful work that you and IFSHA are doing.

what an inspiring post to end the year 2005 and look forward to newer beginnings.

happy new year to one and all.

love,
Aachi

Aachi, Harb, Sundar Thanx

Thank You all for you kind words.

Sundar indeed pain is an invaluable teacher and I have found that it also sculpts and chisels us in fine ways, truly making us unique and wholesome if we surrender to its wisdom.

Harb it is so strange that wisdom words which I have heard and learnt since childhood take on a completely new vista of truth and being unlike anything every told or explained by others. It is like when the inner muse awakens she begins to unfold the core meaning of the most turgid texts in stupefying ways. And you are so right, the meaning is oceanic and metaphoric of the Grand Unity over and over again.

love and a joyous ringing out of the Year to all.

Great article. What an amazing title. And Harb you have also said it so eloquently "Pain is there to make you die to your previous small self so as to enable you to now be born to a greater self". I think we dont hear enough stories of hope, courage and dignity nowadays. The media is only interested in selling crises and trauma and sensationalism to us. These kinds of pieces therefore are really important not only as stories of great courage but also as alternate ways to be.

Thanks for this.

Dear jasjit - thank you for that, such a powerful piece of writing. I'm forwarding this particular piece to a couple of women I know, all trapped in a self-serving "pain" - abuse, childhood, screwed up parents, rotten lovers - you name it and its all painful. Just to share another reality of how we deal with pain, esp us privileged pampered people. I recently attended a toxic family wedding where pain had become this fabulous piece of manipulation...the bride was the main culprit and her mother is perhaps the origin of this pain pattern ..."everyone must pamper and indulge me because i had so much pain when i was a teenager so i will behave like a (*&^%)..."
this pain is her reason to exist! Is it really pain anymore, I think its just become a living thriving part of her that gets revisited every day. MOstly in the form of psychosomatic illnesses. All that the rest of us could do was to just love and be warm and enjoy ourselves because it would not behove our own humanity to play into that kind of manipulation...I had a chat with her before I left - a last ditch attempt to reach out to someone i love, someone who used to be a vibrant child. Of course none of this is pain anymore, just attention seeking of some kind i guess, laziness, comfortable in the cocoon of helplessness that the memory of pain creates. She is definitely going to be forwarded this piece but I have no illusions about anything working except the REAL pain of life's (or the after-life) lessons!
Happy new year to everyone in this space. Love Maya

Dearest MG

Thank You for enjoying the piece.
Stop being so annoyed with her. If only she could see what you do and that is why awareness is a skin sister of gratitude because as you bow for your own release and liberation you also bow because you know you could just as well still be her. Compassion dear friend is the only key. She manipulates and festers because she refuses to let herself 'really' feel the anger and pain as she expereinced it. Instead she has turned it on others (remember that projection pattern we discussed ad nauseum). Who knows perhaps you will be pleasantly surprised and she will thank you and indeed contemplate it for a better place to move to. So send it with a prayer in your heart and love for her soul and watch the miracle unfold.

Like I said the victim is just our masked warrior, only a hair breadth away and yet untapped they are seprated by what seems like an insurmountable chasm. You are right we are a pmpered lot, not just becaue of the priveleges of our time and condition but also because of the amazing access we have to wisdom/healing words and loving hearts like you. Yet we manage to shroud ourselves tight in the pit of our illusions. Your namesake is a wicked one.

On that note send Reiki to all these women you wish love and liberation for and know you are in their lives to touch them with light.

Warm hugs and an adventurous New Year to you and all who visit this space.

Thank You White Horse

Your words are warm and and what you say about the media is so true. Perhaps we can all be attentive to making a difference in our own ways rather than let a mixed bag like the media dictate our world to us.

Much love and warm tidings for 2006

they are seperated by what seems to be an insurmountable chasm...beautiful words..the feeling of separatedness, in my opinion is the root of man's misery in whatever situation...

Jasjit,

I wrote a long piece yesterday it somehow got lost.

Anyway, I think we come to know the truths of the holy texts only when we have already realized them through our own experiences, reflections and practically going through life's ups and downs. Then we really don't learn anything new from those books but just confirm our own realized truths in them here and there.

Harb

Harb

Perfectly articulated. I have found myself comprehending Sanskrit texts and totally unreal levels without any prior knowledge or exposure to their wisdom. What I find totally exciting though is that a strange unification thread works through the conciousness now constantly and just seems to wed everything, even if seemingly diverse, and brings it to the same oneness principle. So when I read Zen I find my mind quoting a similar stance in Tantra, or when I hear shabad from Gurbaani (even when I have heard it many times in the past) it will suddenly link itself to a Buddhist sutra I am contemplating or else help clarify a line of Vashist that I may be stuck on. Followed always by a strange gush of laughter like joy inside.

Hmmm 'Jo brahmandey so hi Pinde'

Jasjit,

I myself have not read much texts except about them from here and there so I may not be able to exactly decipher the meaning of your last line but as perhaps you may be knowing already, I have written a book "Self Designed Universe" in which I have explained the whole universal Game of Life in one go in terms of the One or Oneness. So you must be right in finding that One or Oneness underlying all texts because all are trying to explain the same play of the one at different levels and times.

Harb.

Harb

I am not too well-read either but reading had been the most steady companion through life. And I had this strange ability to sense meaning deeper than the words conveyed so many things have left a deep impression. Though for the last few years reading is selective and rare. I have seen your website and book and look forward to reading it one day soon. I am sure it braves the world of unconventional wisdom.

'Jo Brahmandey sohi pindey' is a line from Gurbaani which haunted me even as a child. It just drew me to its meaning though of course I was unable to grasp the indication then. It means that which is in the body is mirrored identically in the Universe and vice-versa

jasjit lol,

It was from gurbaani! I thought it was from some sanskrit text. Mein tan ise kar ke hi dar gaya. Yes, I can now understand it though the meaning of it I knew since long. As I said somewhere else, both these inner and outer worlds go in creative, corresponding dialogue. Finally there will be no inner world and outerworld. Time for the cyclical Game of Life to start again!

My book will not be an easy read. In fact it is for the initiated in the subject of evolution. I thought, enough of so-called spiritual masters in the world I should say something on a diffrent level.

But yes it will be unconventional. In fact it will put all the sciences of the world on their head. Moreover, people will begin to know why there is problems in relationships espcially in the relationships of husband and wife...

BTW, my book may not be available in India yet. But I have a few spare copies if you can send me your address. I can send the same to you as a gift. Do you live at Delhi? Can you write to me at harb_singh@yahoo.com?

Harb.

PS: I myself have noticed receding interest in reading books. On one level I think it is because of the feeling that we have not much left to be known about. On an other level, as I have explained in my book, I in fact know we are now passing the age of books, of 'to know' and are entering the age 'to be'.

Jasjit,

what you say regarding the concurrence of various paths applies also to the lovely statement that you have given.

'Jo brahmandey so hi Pinde'

I didnt know this sentence before now but have come across various similar references to this like for example what is in the microcosm is in the macrocosm etc...

Harb,

I think reading texts or spiritual books froms a part of the early sadhana. After that when the truth is realised there wont be any need for texts. then the books are either used for reference of higher experiences or for teaching.

It is like a roadmap discarded once the destination is reached.

Dear Jasjit; I was very moved by this post, which was brought to my attention to read.

Though I was not a victim of rape, or sexual assault; I was a victim of child-poverty in an extreme sense; which seems to come back to haunt my body.

Let me mention; poverty leaves deep scars, and seeping wounds; that seem to re-surface in later years.

It seems, I've come full circle in many ways on this path; and find myself once more, poor and sickly.

Once again, in my community and among my peers, I find myself trying to thwart becoming severely labeled and stigmatized, as a loser, just because I am a poor, middle-aged single Mom on a disability. Trust me, one cannot get disability in Canada if not qualified. Ppl with cancer, have a hard time getting it!

To keep from going mad in this situation; and to remain ever active as a member of my community:

I am a President of a large group of women, approximately sixty or more. I remain an active community volunteer yet, society still places me below them. I feel like, I am not "permitted" to sit at their tables to feast; though just years ago, when I had money, car, etc. I was accepted among them. That was hard to handle; knowing I had such false friends.

I found this all terribly confusing to deal with; but, deal with it I did/do.

Reading about Shanti, has greatly planted a deep aspiration within myself; to walk a little faster, a little lighter, a lot farther, to heal my inner wounds.

Thankyou for posting such wonderful life-issues Jasjit. Though it hurts to know rape occurs, particularly it pains me when it's a child; it is comforting to know, womens rights are becoming more prominent in developing countries!

WE may have rights here in Canada; however, as anywhere, when condemned to a life on disability in one's forties; one is succumbed to the often unpleasantries of social outcasting; being robbed/victimized, and shown less respect even in the medical treatment, etc.

I find, though I participate in groups; when I am not; I almost become reclusive, just so nobody will know "I am here."

North

north, tx for accepting my invite to drop in here..i am sure you will enrich this space...

Hi North,

welcome to the blog.

its wonderful to see your name. As sundar said, I am also sure of this space being more richer by your presence.

Dear North

A very warm welcome and a blissful New Year to you filled with great beginnings, resonant of all your deepest desires.

Glad the piece was inspirational. Actually I have lived in Canada (B.C) for a few years when I was at University (eons ago 25 year to be precise)and saw much of the poverty and discrimination your refer to. Going from India it was a shock to my system that a first world socity carried such ills in abundance. However they were lessons well learnt for me. In fact my family owned a hotel in Northern B.C in a place called Lilloet and the largest population there was native Indian. Though the natural beauty was mind-blowing the state of poverty and rejection that I saw there broke my heart and had made me quite angry. I had written some pieces in The Vancouver Sun on my outrage at how a whole people were being marginalized and abused by rampant racism. I used to be quite fiery in my Political Science classes too on the similar issues and naturally rubbed many white Canadians the wrong way. Alas mainstream views have never scared or bothered me so for the few years I was there I did my own little bit in shaking up people around me to look at how they devalued humans and supported marginalization by their socio-political policies.
Having read you at Intent carefully I find you carry the ideal combination if I may say so for transcendence. While your suffering has been intense so has your spirit to fight, understand and heal both yourself and others. There can be no better combination. That is why you carry the number 7 in your birth because the karmic fields you bring are strong in helping you rise as the warrior cutting through the victim to know the essence of true conquest. Remember I referred to your name North. Well let's see what it indicates, the peak, cold, icy conditions, where mountains and pristine conditions reside, ice which is the purest form of water before it melts to flow and enrich the lands on its way to the Ocean and of course the mystifying Northern Lights of Canada. You are all these things.

If I may be presumptuous enough to suggest, contemplate the entire gamut of North and know the challenge is great but the blessing even greater.

I know your left elbow and shoulder gave you a lot of pain. It is the feminine (the route of cosmic wisdom) which is hurting and wanting release and healing so you may bring the Yin/Yang to balance. Your Ynag is powerful and a fighter but the Yin needs purging and healing.

If you do not find it intrusive, I can suggest some very powerful Reiki chants and meditations to help. You can write to be privately if you wish at ifsha@vsnl.com

You are blessed and all will come together in amazing ways.
Love

Dear North

A warm welcome to the blog. Wishing you health, happiness, peace and joy for the new year. May it truly be a year of endings and new beginnings for you. Thanks for sharing some of you. Looking forward to getting to know you more.

love
Anusheh

Dear Jasjit,

We always try to keep ourselves away from anything bad happening to us. But no matter how much we try we all face it in one form or the other. Perhaps God has purposely not given us an immune system which sheilds us from pain coz otherwise we will never be able to build the antibodies to make us stronger.

Well Said Shohini!

Hello Jasjit; in hindsight I should have introduced myself in a better fashion; and perhaps explained things in a more thought-out fashion as well, as I feel my purpose missed a target I was aiming for.

Many thanks for the warm welcome Jasjit.

Sohini; that was so well stated, it gave me a strange surge or rush, of self-awakening. What a pure truth!

In the beginning or top of my slide, I'll call it; fear has a way of deafening inner pleaing for freedom from pain; until all the pain is indeed absorbed. Every facet must be drained.

while sliding(not into addictions or sexual freedom either), just facing human fears, doubts and unknowns I'd not faced before; this is where pain resides.

Who does not feel a rush while going down a giant slide? We lose our breath. We laugh. We cry. WE suddenly know what doubt is(will I land ok?)

Nobody knows at all, how they'll react to pain; until pain is thiers to counter-act.

What is unique about pain though is; we can measure it, sure; we can teach it, learn about it; but, one can know real pain fully or truly; without being part of pain; there are so many ways to be pained; it's endless.

This is not to say; great teachers cannot be great teachers unless being through pain; I think, anyone with compassion for a living being or thing, feels pain; which means hopefully, at least 95% of the world's pop.? lol

But, like the women raped; and my fear of this incurable diseases that control me presently; these are pains, known only deeply by us.

I only try to be like Shanti; and not be outcasted by my peers, my community, or my family; I too, struggle to find a place in society. I hope to encourage other middle aged women, to do the same. Stay active, stay alive in your heart. Interaction is a life-force; and I see so many women, become isolated.

It's for these reasons, I'll talk about pain I've had that has passed; and pain I endure that too, will pass with time. One day, I may feel free enough to talk about the pain I cannot talk about; that cannot pass yet.

Well truly, I sure like the peace, the knowledge, the fruitful compassion I see here Jasjit; what a wonderful learning "center" where I see so many of you are doing such wonderful things to enhance the lives of those whom suffer life's tragedies, burdens and unseen circumstances.

May the Universe always Bless me; as it has in meeting wonderful women/men such as is here. I commend you each, for your dedicated work in healing the wounded, the outcast, the lost, the not lost, but community-stuck where the lost are made to congregate in projects(wink.)

North

Hello Sundar, I did not read the blog before posting my response. lol I am an absent-minded one, to be sure! Thanks for pointing me here; I've learned tremendous courage from this blog-post already Sundar! you are a very caring and compassionate person Sundar! Not trying to make you blush; but you have a kind heartedness about you.

Hello to you too, Aachi; how are things with you these days? I am in the middle of designing a book cover, and feel in my "world" at last! lol Thanks for the welcome Aachi.

Jasjit; just read your earlier comments to me; I am melted into the essence of wow! lol Thankyou for such rave reviews of my leonine attributes; you are so close, it's scary(smiles) and you do set a new tone, to my overall picture, thanks for that. Not many are seeing what I am trying to portray like you. Sundar did too. I wish I was better at describing what I want to say; about my experiences.

Yes, it's quite disturbing Jasjit to see racial tensions still exist in todays modern world. I don't understand it, never did. I don't understand community discrimination for people disabled either. Once hard-working taxpayers! It was disturbing to see how quickly a community can turn on it's weakest, and outcast them promptly to the projects. It's like shell-shock in many ways. We are unprepared for it, let alone the system provided to guide us through.

What a strange, strange life I've manifested.

Hmm, I know first-hand Jasjit about activism. I used to write articles to newspapers about social issues pertaining to lone-parent women and the disabled and aged. I held nothing back, short of accusing them(government) of being seduced by the dark side; when they abolished mothers allowance here in canada(a social safety-net system for single parent women); gone, gone now; instilled in 1920; ousted in 1996-97.

In the beginning, it was ok advocating and putting myself in the line of fire; I saw some light for the plight.

Then the community turned on me, I got threats, my car was destroyed. I"m now blackballed from employment here; and it appears my son can't get work either. my last name seems to carry a label of possible doom and/or plagued of jinx and bad luck; and it could be contagious in their view?

what I want society to know; IS, I am the same, upstanding, outstanding citizen today; as I was when I was socially accepted as a tax-payer. Now that the pay-it-forward comes back to me in disability payments, and paultry to add; while I am suffering disabling disease, I am no longer community-worthy, I mean a big yikes escapes my lips!

Well Jasjit; I hope too, I am all them many nice and wonderful things you see in me(smiles.)

Good "eye" Jasjit. Yes, will email you thanks; the shoulder is better, NO tearing; so it was given a cortisone shot just before christmas which did wonders; but, still hurts,,so will try the rieki, thankyou!

Anusheh; thank you to you as well, for the warming welcome!

North

north, it has been said that what we have in ourselves we tend to see in others...thank you for being a part of this space...

Dear North

I would first like to share some personal lessons learnt in activism at great cost to health and energy. In this desire to help/change the world/carry the torch for justice for all and of course love and nurture everyone possible who has been a 'victim' I never realized that the depest longing was to heal my own 'victim' within, to right the wrongs done against me, to be there for others like I would have liked them to be for me. So for many many years(hmm 15 or so)I worked at a pitch and intensity, travelled the length and breadth of this huge nation, went into every nook and corner possible and held out my hand/shoulder/heart and arms for all who I think needed "ME". Forgetting (no just unaware to be precise) that it was me that needed me first and then all would become an extension. So I looked at the law, corrupt police, governance, cruel families, brutal husbands, etc etc and raged and ranted about change.

One day (not exactly) it all changed out of sheer exhaustion and I was forced to look elsewhere. Naturally now the only place left was inside so kicking and screaming (on second thought more like whimpering since I had no energy left LOL)I went inside and the veil lifted.

Now I can see that the entire play staged outside was for me to resolve the inner for it mirrored exactly the outer. Only then did I discover that life is to be lived like a Monarch-NOTHING short of it North- Master of all you see and are and then what flows towards and from you is only abundance, nurturance, love and ecstacy.

I offer these words in great humility to one such as you because I know in the solitariness of your pain and struggles the size of what you face is indeed awesome. But I have no other way to express that the Monarch awaits within you North. When she emerges all-the community/tirades/financial stress/bad social safety nets etc will all be there and yet not. For you will belong to a whole new realm and abundance will be both your gift to you and others.

It is strange( am just thinking aloud on the strange bit) that I write this with so much conviction! I guess North I see it for you as I have known it for me with conviction too!!!!

How wonderful to be able to say this to someone you hardly know and yet feel it like a most intimate truth. Must be what unified consciousness feels like in interaction! Thank You North for this sudden experience that I have had through you.

Buckets of love, hugs and infinite blessings for your Way

beautiful shares , north and an insightful response, jasjit..tx..should help others too...

jasjit, i also wrote almost the same things to north a day before...she needs to save energy from looong posts and look within...i can see she is exhausted...

and your experience...oh yes i can well understand. as i often say, to those whom nature wants to have such experiences would not allow any progress outside...that is, till the experience...later the progress may come on its own...and sometimes even in unimagined directions...

Harb

Nothing is lost...all is the feeding soil for the great flowering, not one moment amiss, not one hurt not a single blow unecessary. And then it all adds to the uniqueness of the flower that you will be and that very special fragrence that you will carry. Otherwise all fruition would be a boring indiscriminate mass of smiling Buddhas.

yes jasjit,

when this all is a perfect play of the perfect one how anything can be amiss...sordid things happen we try to address them yet knowing all along that all is in the scheme!

Dear Sundar; if it is pain we share; we have chosen wisely(smiles.)

Jasjit; first paragraph said it all; my intentions that spawned my activism too, was to make a difficult world much more manageable and decent. I went through all the same process's you've mentioned.

The strangeness is; I am quite aware of all you mention. Perhaps, this little butterfly is stuck to the cocoon by a thread? Trust me, I am struggling to be free'd. I shake, quake and tweak every fibre of my being to reach for the next cognitive level; which will severe the tie which binds me still, to a form of victimhood; however in a more minor state as say, a few years ago.

I think, the journey of life is equally beautiful and not so beautiful. To be able to experience both, in such a compound effect, is probably the only way, I'd learn how to actually fly?(smiles.)

Jasjit, I am pleased to know I have offered any form of valuable insight to you. I love the butterfly, and have been collecting butterfly things since 1980! lol Now, I know exactly why, more than I did before.

Dear Harb, I'm so touched that you worry about me; but, I wish you wouldn't. Yes, I am exhausted in many respects; but, lethargy is more energy-draining, don't you think? lol Besides I'm too much of a creative person to be idle. but, my ladies group starts tomorrow, I thought in 6 more days; so time will be less spent responding, and more reading; it would seem that you and the Universe have conspired to force my proper rest?(wink.)

Jasjit; good response in the blows: it is only in the past say, 6 months; that I have come to realize, everything I go through, and will go through yet; is in large part, my fluttering(wink). All birthing is painful; why would the birth of mature self, be anything less than same?

Much love and respect to each,

North

hey. north , is not pain also an underlying unifier...so much universality to our situations in life through myriad manifests...indeed, we share in that link...

Well Said North

I would add however that a time comes when physical/emotional depletion is high enough to start becoming self-destructive. A radical course-correction then is critical and only then can we begin to fully heal. In its absence the inability for the mind/body to sustain itself could sometimes become irrevocable.

The offer to send you the Reiki chants and practices still stands. If you like you can write to our personal mail and I will send them accompanied with instructions.
Much love

Hello Sundar; yes, I would agree with you on that. : )

Jasjit; will email you in a few moments, thankyou! And yes, I must concurr; I do need rest; but, I stopped advocating back in 2002-03.

I had realized at that time, I was burning the candle at both ends, and in lieu lost sight of my health and wellbeing.

I commit myself to volunteerism and in the past, activism to prevent becoming invizible and perhaps lost in lethargy and isolation.

I have found a happy balance, however becoming Pres. of this group of ladies; has sure zapped my energy, and I really feel it! lol

Ok, going to email you Jasjit.

North