Dear Sundar,

I did not undrestand what you say. But I want to ask qeustion. I can forget pain bu how can i forgiv someone who cause me pain?

hi ikp, happy new year to u...i will try and answer ur q the way i best know...whenw e say we have forgotten something, some bad event or unpleasant happening...we have just sihifted it out of our surface consciosness...the event remains embedded within us as a suppression..the cycle is not completed...such a lot of hurts and pains stay accumalated within us and create various problems for us in our interactive spaces..some deep suppressions also manifest as various sicknesses and disease...
in the technique i have shared, there is acertain fullness to the cycle...and we dont have to "try" and forgive, it is not matter of some effort..forgiveness , of ourselves and others involved in that play is a natural outcome...to me, forgiveness is an essential part of the completing the cycle in healing spaces...btw if you are intersted in knowing it, you can share what you did not understand, i can try explaining it to the best of my abilities and as simply as possible...

Dear Sundar
Can you please explain a little more about spiritual pain? Is there any way we can do something and experience it more?

Buas

Dear Buas,
as a great poet has once mentioned, Dil Hi Nahin tho Dil Ke saharon ka Kya karoon; jab pas tum nahin tho baharon ka kya karoon...sometimes we have everything yet nothing...there is a disinterest, meaninglessness, boredom with all that we encounter in life..we mechanically go through the routines and are acutely aware of it...there is a tremendous indifference...lack of enthusiasm...we try to fill ourselves up with various things but the void only gets enhanced..no filling up fills up that space..there is a death within , a dryness...we seek meaning to our lives at these moments...we want to find a purpose for our existence...
normally, in traditional spaces, society has conspired to keep these questions away..a favourite strategy in traditional communities has been to get a person married...some communities even have a symbolic "kashi yatra" where the bride's father resists the bridegroom from "giving" up this world...
Spiritual sufferings are channeled into psychological relationship spaces this way...
personally, i feel being in touch with our suffering is the key to effect any healing...or liberation.normally, we have dexterous management mechanisms for escaping the sorrow within..we immerse ourselves in activities , forgetting the pain ...but this forgetting does not take away the pain..it remains within us deep down...and manifests in myriad ways...like destructive behavioural tendencies, dis-ease of various kinds and so on..depression is a chronic manifest...the burden of hurts we carry within cripples us in our external world...
the purpose of life is to live...it is a celebration which has acquired burdensome hues..
chakra meditatiions , particularly on the anahata ( heart) chakra are very useful in addressing this pain...most of our spiritual heart spaces are dead...a lack of feeling ...and activating the heart chakra goes a long way in aiding healing processes here..mind spaces are intrinsically incapable of joy and love...the heart spaces need awakening....

Dear Buas, I will share a story which helped me see this pain..hope it helps you too...

a widowed mother and her 5 year old son go to the local mela for an evg of fun and frolic...they are enamoured by the celebrations there..soon it is dark and the boy goes to buy some savouries...he soon loses himself in the crowd....the mother searches for him frantically but no luck...he goes missing...she is distraught...she wails and cries and runs hither and thither...she collapses..her relatives come around, pick her up...take her home.. a police complaint is lodged...the woman cannot eat,she cannot sleep; the pain is raw...unbearable...a few days pass, she is still not eating...she is pining away...soon her relatives force some morsels down her throat..she begins eating a bit...gradually a few weeks pass, no sign of the son...the pain is still there but there is a numbing...a distancing as compared to the first day...soon a year passes by and more...her relatives suggest that she start taking some tuitions to keep herself occupied...she does it..it soon grows to a few students and becomes an institution in few years..her pain has energized this achievement in her...the pain is still there but it is a distant memory...numbed, but not gone away....
25 years later, she gets a telephone call from a young man claiming to be her long-lost son..who has come to her through some search processes...something wakes up within the mother...the pain , the suffering comes to a completion....
so it is with our lives, there is a disconnect with our cores for whetever reason; call it God or what you may...this disconnect, whenever it has happened has caused us unbearable pain...but like the management mechanisms of the woman, we too have filled ourselves up...but the pain lingers, deep down..an unknown longing...a seeking of a sense of completion, a sense of fulfilment...This pain, if we are alert enough to observe is a constant underlying presence in our lives..it manifests as a sense of incompletion, a residual discontent...
it is only the awakening of a dynamic and personalized spirituality within us which can address this pain...This pain is essentially the sense of seperatedness we experience...

let me clarify that management mechanisms need not perse be bad; the lack of awareness and keeping that pain alive and being in touch is a critical key to healing in my opinion...in the case of suppressions , the pain has to actually resurface to enable a healing...wounds have to be opened up to treat them...in this case, opening up by itself is healing....