Oh shubhoshree

I still have tears of laughter streaming down my face, that was truely a funny one.

Hey Madhavi,

Tell me about it!! It had me in splits too the first time I read it.

:-D

"God gave us two ends. One to sit on and one to think with. Success depends
on which one you use; head you win -- tails, you lose."

NOW THESE MAY NOT BE FUNNY BUT THEY SURE ARE TRUE!

Law of queue: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, ur nose will begin to itch.

Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

Bath THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

LAW of the RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!

LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Hello Guys. Im back:) Here's a joke for all of you.

A 70 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting. When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal?"

She replied: "A can of peaches."

The judge asked her why she had stolen them and she replied: "I was hungry."

The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.

She replied: "6."

The judge then said, "I will give you 6 days in jail."

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman's husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.

He said, "What is it?"

The husband said, "She also stole a can of peas."

Hey all,

Thought I will share a funny website with all of you here. Its a spoof on the Mahabharata done by a lady who calls herself Crystal Blur. Its hilarious! She has done 6 chapters so far. Here is the link to the first one. You can find the links for the rest of them on the right hand side column.

http://aashraya.blogspot.com/2005/11/chapter-1-60-year-old-virgin.html

Enjoy! :-)

Sir: bachcho kasam khao kabhi shrab, sigret nahi
pioge, non veg nahi khaoge.
Bachche: nahi khaenge sir.
Sir: kabhi ladkiyon ko nahi chhedoge.
Bachche: Theek hai sir.
Sir: Jua nahi kheloge.
Bachche: ok sir.
Sir: Desh ke liye jaan bhi de doge.
Bachche: de denge sir, aisi jaan ka aur karenge bhi
kya

Good Afternoon everyone! :)

Hi Shubhosree: The Essay about "THE COW" was really enlightening :)) :-D And knowing that he is an IAS now adds to it :-))

Hello Chaitali: Those are really true. Laws of Queue & Result - have been a victim myself ;-).

Hello Anusheh: :-) Good to have you back. And the can of laughter was a good one indeed. ;-)

Take care y'all.

After reading all those & laughing my guts out..
Mere andar ka chupa hua shaayar cheekh cheekh kar
pukar raha hai ki-(statutory warning :Read it at your own peril coz This may put the likes of Respected Ghalib & Mir to shame)

aapne mere man se khel
aapne mere tan se khela
apne mere dhan se khela
Well played! well played! well played!!

tum aa gaye ho
noor aa gaya hai
chalo teeno movie chalen

jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le jalim
bijli ko haath lagaya to bijli chali gayi

LAL DIWAR PAR CHUNE SE LIKHA THA GHALIB NE
LAL DIWAR PAR CHUNE SE LIKHA THA GHALIB NE
YAHAN LIKHANA MANA HAI.

WOH SADAK KE IS PAAR THI - HUM SADAK KE US PAR THE
KUCH HUM AAGE BADHE, KUCH VOH AAGE BADHI
HUM KUCH AUR AAGE BADHE, VOH BHI KUCH AUR aaGE BADHI
AB HUM SADAK KE US PAR THE, AUR VOH SADAK KE IS PAR THI.

Main hu yahan, tu hai wahan
-Main hu yahan, tu hai wahan
Lifebouy hai jahan,
tandurusti hai waha
*wah*wah*wah*wah

Kehte hain ki ISHQ main neend ud jaati hai
Koi humse bhi ishq kare
Khambhaqat neend bahut aati hai !!!

Kar diya izhare-ishq hamne telephone par,
laakh rupaye ki bat thi,
do rupaye main ho gayee (wah wah)

Yaron yeh pyaar hai pyaar
Nahin koi Vim Bar
Jo thodasa lagaya aur bas hogaya.......!!

Log ishq karte hain,
Bade shor ke saath.
Humne bhi kiya,
Bade zor ke saath.
Magar ab karenge,
Thoda gaur ke saath.
Kyonki kal usko dekha,
Kisi aur ke saath !!!!

Tere dar par sanam hazaar baar aayenge,
Tere dar par sanam hazaar baar aayenge,
Tere dar par sanam hazaar baar aayenge,
Ghanti bajainge aur bhaag jayenge !

Arz kiya hai, Door se dekha to santra tha, pass jake dekha to sntra tha,
chil ke dekha to bhi sntra tha,
Khake dekha to bhi sntra tha.
Wah kya sntra tha !

Part II agle hafte :-)

Hi Surya, Missed all of you.

Prasun, wah wah kya shair o shairee thi maza aa gaya. Yeh meri contribution hai

Door se dekha to laga anday uball rahe they
Paas jaa keh dekha to ganjay uchal rahe they
:)

Ghalib must be turning in his grave right now!! But good ones! :-))

Here is one more ...

As daily habit Pintu was reading the newspaper. Suddenly he asked his father, " Dad! What does it mean by 'Governance System' ? "

" Its Like...", father said while thinking, " See! I earn and bring money to home, mean's I am a 'Money Holder'. Your mother decides where and
how to spend that money and that means she is 'Government'. That maid in our home is doing all the household works, so she will be 'Labour
Class'. You are a 'Common man' or 'Public'. Your kid brother is 'Future' or the 'Next Generation', understand?".

That day Pintu slept with all those thoughts. In the middle of the night he woke-up because his kid brother was crying. He wet the matress so he was crying. Pintu went to wake up his mother. She was in deep sleep so Pintu went to the maid's room to wake her up. But there his father was sleeping. So he came back with frustration.

Next morning father asked Pintu, " Hey Pintu Darling! You understood the 'Governance System'? ".

Pintu replied, " Yeah Dad, I understood! When money Holder is exploiting Labour Class, our Government is sleeping. Future of our nation is
crying for not getting their basic needs fulfilled and in all this Common Man is suffering !".

Hey Surya!

aamaar bhalo laaglo shune je tomar essay ta bhalo legechhe!

:-)

Cant stop laughing!!! They are too good! Thanks to everyone for that!

Here is a cute little joke I read somewhere ...

------------------
Two mad cows in a pasture near a highway see a tank truck pass by with a sign on the side reading: "Pasteurized, homogenized, standardized and Vitamin D added."

One turns to the other and remarks, "Makes you feel sort of inadequate, doesnt it?"

-----------

Have fun you guys! :-)

There was a contest for the toughest army unit in the world. Three armies made it - the Kremlin Guards, the American GI and .... the Jat regiment. Nothing could break the deadlock - each was better than the other and it was getting diffcult to decide the winner. Finally each was asked to do what they did best.

First the Red Army got in a line and Putin waving a cement cosh walked slowly along until he came to the thinnest shortest and weakest of them all. "Strip Soldier!" Putin barked upon which the guard dropped his pants. Putin waved the cosh by its long end and ..... "Thwack!" hit the poor Red Guard between his legs as hard as he could. Tears of pain streamed down the soldiers eyes but not a cry escaped his tightly pursed lips. Nor did he move. "Did it hurt soldier?" Putin asked. "No Sir!" said the guard. "Why Soldier?" Putin asked. The guard stuck out his chest and said "Because I am a Red Guard Sir!". The entire stadium broke out in admiring applause.

Next was the turn of the Americans. They lined up and Georgie took the parade with an iron baton. He too picked the weakest of the burly GIs and shouted - "Strip GI" . The GI too dropped his pants, upon which Georgie went .. 'Thomp!". For all the force of the stroke, the only sign on the GI's face was the vanishing of the grin. But no other sign to match the blood flowing profusely down his thighs.

"Did it hurt GI?"
"No Sir"
"Why"
"Because I am an American GI"
This bought the audience to their feet!. Surely this would win....

Next the Jats in all their smart finery and the sword sheathed to their waist lined up with Manmohan inspecting them. Manmohan with the confidence in his breed did not even bother to pick. Turning to the first Jat with a fixed vacant gleam in his eye he slowly unbuckled the poor guy's sword as a collective "Ooooooohhhh" rang from the crowd, unsheathed it from its clave and whispered gently to the still smiling Jat - "Pant Utaar Puttar.." The Jat complied. Manmohan shut his eyes, bit his lips, raised the sword and with a prayer to forgive his soul, brought it down as hard as he could and castrated the still smiling Jat. There was blood everywhere. The stadium shocked into silence.

"Kyon Puttar - Dard Hua?"
"Nahin Sir" said the proud Jat.
"Kyon Nahin Puttar"
"Mera nahin tha Sir. Peeche wale ka tha."

guys, the jokes are terrific.

Shalini, I burst out laughing. :)

Dear Anusheh, welcome back!

Lovely shayaris Prasun.

Doooooooooooooor se dekha.....tho kuch bhi nahin dikha....( wah wah )
Paaaaaaaaaaaaaas jaake dekha tho.......
Kuch bhi nahin tha!:)

Dooooooooooooor se dekha tho,
baarsih ho raha tha....
paaaaaaaaaaaaas jaake dekha tho...
bheeg gaya....:)

Subhosree

It was really funny. BTW. I was thinking like .. How did she get this extract? ;-)

Aachi you have taken the level of shairee to a whole new (low) standard:)Very funny.
Hi Karthik, she has actually written it herself!

Dear Karthik,

Good Morning! assuming you are referring to the Mahabharata spoof, yep, Crystal Blur (as she calls herself) has done this herself. And what a brilliant job she has done! Glas you enjoyed it.

Hello everyone!! :-)

Good one Aditya! :-))

Gooood Morning everyone!

Yeah Shubhosree I remember this one. Only difference was that in the one I had heard it was a school boy who had by hearted a composition on Cow. Unfortunately his exam paper read write a composition on Vidya Sagar. So he went about writing his composition. "Vidya Sagar has two horns, four legs and a tail with which he keeps away flies...." and the rest you can imagine!

Shalini I liked that one.

Prasun, Anusheh, Aachi wah kya Shairi!

An old man was sitting on a bench in the mall when a young man with spiked hair came over and sat down beside him. The boy's hair was yellow and green and orange and purple. He had black make up around his eyes. The old man just stared at him.

With an attitude, the boy said, "What's the matter, old man, haven't you ever done anything wild in your life?"

The old man answered, "Well yes, actually, I have. I got drunk once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son.

Have a great day everybody and keep blogging!

haha. funny.. good one. subhosree. Hello Anusheh ;-)

Dear Shubhosree,
That was priceless! Gotta love the Hinglish language!

Here's a sher from the move tere naam:
pehle usne ras kaha
phir usne gul kaha
phir usne le kaha
is tarah zaalim ne rasgulle ke tukde tukde kar diye

Good Morning All

Great jokes. Here's one I love and fear.

"Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen.

This is your captain PATEL (Boniface) welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board of Air India. We apologize for the four-day delay in
taking off...it was due to bad weather and some overtime I had to put in at the bakery.

This is flight 717 to Mumbai. Landing there is not guaranteed, but we will end up somewhere in India. And, if luck is in our favour, we may even be landing on your village!

Air India has an excellent safety-record... In fact, our safety standards are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us!

It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of our passengers have reached their destination. If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange to turn them off!

To make your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable, we serve complimentary DHARU and Wada pavw.
For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you find out if there really is a God!

We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie
buffs, we will be flying right next to Emirates Airline, where their movie will be visible from the right side of the cabin window.

There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow down!

In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible for the best view. If however, we go a little too close, do let us know.... our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark!

Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a seat-belt, kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And, for those of you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase."
"Thanking you all for choosing Air-India to fly for the first and last time"

"AIR INDIA--a name u can trust!!""

Hello everyone! :-)

Welcome Alka! Glad you enjoyed it :-)

Good Morning Friends

Here comes a One-liners Special.

Have a great day ahead.

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...
-- Sir Norman Wisdom

One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.
-- Edgar Watson Howe

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your
success!
-- Doug Larson

A harmful truth is always better then...a useful lie !!!
-- Eric Bolton

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.
-- Erno Philips

I only go to work on days that don't end in a 'y'.
-- Robert Paul

We spend the first twelve months of our children's liv! es teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
-- Phyllis Diller

Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
-- Victor Borge

Start every day with a smile and get it over with.
-- W.C. Fields

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
-- Will Rogers

Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out,you haven't wasted a whole day.
-- Mick ! ey Rooney

Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison.
-- Tim Allen

If you never want to see a man again, say, 'I love you, I want to marry you. I want to have children...' - they leave skid marks.
-- Rita Rudner

I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-- Woody Allen

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
-- Erica Jong

Don't take life too seriously, you'll never get out of it alive.
-- Elbert Hubbard

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.
-- Wndell Johnson

In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out.
-- Joey Adams

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.
-- Henry Youngman

Have you noticed that all the people in favour of birth control are already born ?
-- Benny Hill

Alka that was so funny!

Hi Karthik :)

The definition of Cricket as explained to a foreigner ------

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next
man goes in until he's out.

When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.

When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in.

There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.

When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

Simple!

Thats indeed very simple :-)

Shubhosree may be u shud send it to Greg Chappell and tell him to take it easy :-) after all its so simple.

"Its very simple to be Happy,but so difficult to be simple"

HI EVERYONE ! :-)

-------
Can't tell how much I missed all of you guys in the last 2 days.

Just that I had so much at work - but I love my work too.

Seems like I've missed a lot, so pls ignore if I write about something that has already been covered
(though I'll try to read EVERYTHING in here) :-(.
-------

HEY JASJIT :-) - MISSED YOU!! I'm sure you loved/enjoyed most part of your break! ;-)
(And I'm sure I'm gonna know about it as I read thru your piece & comments).

HI ANUSHEH, CHAITALI, PARUN BUDDY ;-)
AND ADITYA, KARTIK, SHALINI, & RAMLATH too.

AND Dear SHUBHOSREE :)
Here's my exact feeling when I saw your comment in Bangla: Felt like a toddler learning to walk and you guys encouraging me to stand up and walk a li'l further with arms wide open (btw that reminds me of Creed - "With arms wide open") :-).

About your comment: Being candid - a long sentence for me but here's an attempt:
When one says "aamaar bhalo laaglo shune je tomar essay ta bhalo legechhe!" - do you mean to say "I'm glad to hear that you liked the essay"? :-(
or could it mean "tomar rachna ta shune je amake bhalo laagchhe!"?
Am a bit confused, but I think its my slippery grammar!?

I know I'm discussing something that doesn't belong here so pls pardon me guys.

Hoping to be here more often :(

Take Care You Guys.

Hey Shubhosree: Crystal Blur - Makes me laugh everytime I read it. Quite something.

And Jasjit: The flight announcements sure sounded scary :-)) Good one.

Hey Prasun, Anusheh, Chaitali, Aachi:

Just can't stop laughing :-))
Too good.

Felt like adding these to it:

Un ki gali say guzray, ajab ittefaq tha
Unho nay phool phainka, gamla bhi saath tha

Mere marney key baad mere doston
Yu aansu na bahanaa
Agar meri yaad aaye to
Seedhey upar chale aana

Tu mere dil mein aise samaayi hai
Jaise baajray ke khet mein bhains ghus aayi hai

More of such funny stuff fwd'ed to me by a friend:
- http://www.apnamaza.com/Funny2.htm
- http://pande.info/?p=104&page=2
- http://groups.msn.com/ROCKNETUzers/0ltff.msnw

Have fun guys :-)

And Prasun, great One-liners!

I've forgotten all the project work already :)
Thanks for the laughter guys.

Dear Surya,

a very Good Morning to you! Your absence was felt on the blog. Good to know that you love your work ... thats a rare thing to hear people say these days. People are mostly complaining about it. Keep it up!

About the translation, the first interpretation is correct. :-) Good going!

Have a wonderful day ahead!

Good Evening Friends

Dear Anusheh,
Just a bit tied down in office..Will be back in full force soon :-)Organising my thoughts..

Till then enjoy reading this..

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed.
She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He
appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. "What's the
matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room.

"Why are you down here at this time of night ?"

The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly.

"Yes I do" she replies.

The husband pauses; the words were not coming easily.

"Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car.............?"
"Yes, I remember" said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continued.. "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I'll send you to jail for 20 years?".

"I remember that too" she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said,

...............

................

.......................

"I would have been released today ! "

Hi Surya, Prasun,

Loved the joke Prasun.

Shorjo tumi besh bhalo bangla bolte sheekhcho.

Hey Prasun,

Loving it all buddy. Keep 'em coming. Will join you guys soon.

Hi Dear Chaitali :-)
I'll be back with a response on this :-P

BRB

Hey Surya

pursue ur case with ur boss..for that half hour break every 3 hours..U can..U will...U must

U also need time to hone up ur Bangla :-)

Hey Surya,

Good to see you! aap to eid ka chaand ban gaye hain :-)

Hi Chaitali :-)

Dear Chaitali :-)
Kemon aacho?

You said - "Shorjo tumi besh bhalo bangla bolte sheekhcho."
If you meant "Surya, you are learning Bangla Well"
(Please confirm)
Then "Dhonobad, parantu ami Jani ki ami bangla aaste aaste sheekcho"

Chatali, Shubhosree, Prasun, Anusheh:
(Banking on you guys to correct me if I'm wrong at this) Actually, I wanted to say "Thanks, but I feel I'm slow at learning it (Bangla)" :-(

And I'm getting seriously conscious that I'm using this place to learn Bangla. Though 'using' is not what I feel about it here with you guys around. Please let me know if this bothers someone, I will refrain from this practice. :-)

Hey Shalini,

Sorry for the late reply :).
BTW, Let Surya be Surya & not Chand ;-)

Talking of names - Your name means "Modest" / "Humble". Nice one :-)

Love All Surya :-)

Hoping to get some time tomorrow (its today already) to check back.

But in Advance -
Wish you all a very Good Morning and Enjoy your Sunday. I'm gonna enjoy the morning by just lying in bed (Hey Shubhosree ... gonna be the King once again eh!?)

Take care Chirpy fellas :-)

I haven't seen North (star), Venkat, Radhika, Sunrise, Buas, Sukanya, and many others since long?
Also, don't see anything from Meenakshi and Vinay. Busy as usual, perhaps.

Wishing the best for all of you.
Any news about Sundar's Mom? Hope she's better now :-)

Hello Everyone,

Hope this makes you smile :)

----------
An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution.
"You need to be careful about trying these techniques at home."

"Why?" asked somebody from the audience.

"I watched my wife's routine at dinner for years," the expert explained. "She made lots of trips between the refrigerator, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying a single item at a time.

One day I told her, 'Honey, why don't you try carrying several things at once?'

"Did it save time?" the guy in the audience asked.

"Actually, yes," replied the expert. "It used to take her 30 minutes to make dinner.
Now I do it in ten..."
--------

Cheers :)

That was funny and sweet Surya. As far as learning Bangla goes hey as long as we're learning something here:) I hope you dont expect me to input though because other than a few select words (largely food related:)I dont know anything:-(

love
a

Good Morning all! :-)

Hey Surya, Good to know that you are the King once again! Enjoy yourself pal! :-) That was a cute joke!

"Dhonobad, parantu ami Jani ki ami bangla aaste aaste sheekcho"

I guess what you want to say is that "Thank you but I know that I am learning Bangla rather slowly". So the right way to say it would be -

"Dhonobad, parantu ami Jani je ami bangla aaste aaste sheekchhi"

Cheers!

Surya you lucky guy, Shubhosree is actually guiding your Bangla. When I asked her to teach me Bangla she raised an eyebrow at me and said "Dont you think you should learn Hindi first." ;)LOL

Hi Shurjo,

Nice to know someone's missing me :-)

Actually I'm at the blog everyday. I never miss reading any of the articles and the comments.I enjoy them immensely.But unfortunately I am not very expressive with words,so I just refrain from commenting.Tomar comments porte khoob bhalo laage :-))

Dear Anusheh,

Thank you all for your support / responses / shares. And I'm just glad to be able to learn such a beautiful language from such great people.
I'm sure she can teach you rather easily since you guys are together at IFSHA all day long - everyday :-(. Now who's lucky!!??

Dear Shubhosree,
Thanks for the corrections. Hmmm ... guess I need to practice my usage of the verbs based on the Object/Subject/Person used in a sentence. :-)

Dear Sunrise,
How can one forget that name :-)
I've seen your comments and found that you express only when you feel like. That's knowing when to act - which is great & not unfortunate. :-)
And you too a Bengali - Wow!! I feel I'm gonna learn Bengali really quick - knowing so many people are their to help me learn this sweet language.

Keem shining you guys :-).

Dear Sunrise

Since the Bengali mafia has completely taken over the blog let me add my two bits by saying Tomar comments porte khoob bhalo laage:) So do write more often

Surya, Sunrise lots of love

Dear Anusheh,
Yes,I'll try to comment more frequently but do pray that my fingers fly more often over the keyboards.

Dear Shurjo,
Will try to show my 'luminous'name more often.Bhaalo theko.

Hey Surya, you are most welcome :-) ..... by the way, I forgot to correct this - just replace the word 'parantu' with 'kintu'. there is no parantu in bangla :-)

My Dear Dear Anusheh,

I would love to teach you bangla but you have to teach me Urdu too!! (lets forget Hindi for now ... hehehee)

Hey Sunrise,

From the way you speak about your daughter, I'm sure she's really proud of you. BTW, does she know about this place - that's blessed with your luminosity? ;-)

Hey Shubhosree,
No "parantu's" just "kintu's". Interesting.

And now I see a Bangla-Urdu exchange in the offing!! Hey Anusheh - not a bad deal eh!?
(this way I'm gonna learn Urdu too :-P )

Have a Great Day & a week ahead everyone! :-)

Hi Surya,

I'm fine thank you. Have been absorbing all the interesting observations, comments and articles being posted on the blog. Here's some real life funny incidents of Bengali's struggling with their Hindi (which is eternal). Sangeeta had told me these incidents thought I'd share them here.

A Bengali gentle man was getting his two storeyed house renovated. He wanted to shift his aged mother from the second floor to the ground floor so that it would be easy for her to go out for her walks without the trouble of climbing down the stairs. The gentleman wanted to tell the workers that he wanted to shift the Indian toilet that his mother was used to using from the second floor to the groundfloor. This is how he expalined it to the workers.

"Mataji ka tutti oopar se niche laga do."

Here's the second one. I think it was the same gentleman still strugling with his hindi.

He was standing at the mother dairy que. An old frail woman was standing in front of him. Suddenly it started raining. He had an umbrella and quickly opened it. But the old lady in the front didn't have one. Now the gentleman wanted to help the old lady. He told the old lady:

"Mataji aap mere chaati ke neechey aa jaeye."

What he actually meant to say was "Aap mere chatri ke neeche aa jaeye."

Hilarious Chaitali!! lol!!

It reminded me of an uncle of mine who had come to Delhi from Kolkata on some official tour and wanted to tell his driver to park the car facing the other way as they would be leaving in the opposite direction. So he tells him -

"Gaadi ko ulti karke rakh do"

And we couldnt stop laughing for the next 2 days! :-))

Hey Surya, the King! Hope you had a relaxed Sunday :-)

A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.

"Hello."

"Is your daddy home?" he asked.

"Yes," whispered the small voice.

May I talk with him?"

The child whispered, "No."

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"

"Yes."

"May I talk with her?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?"

"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"

"No, he's busy", whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

Growing more worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A helicopter" answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

Again, whispering, the child answered, "The search team just landed the Helicopter."

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are
they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle:

"ME."

Good Morning Friends !!

Well ya i am back...from nowhere :-)
Feels great.

Here's a morning dose of laughter !

Little Pappu was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question..
"Pappu , if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"
"None.", replied Pappu . "'cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are thinking."
Little Pappu said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married ?
"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"
"No," said Little Pappu , "the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you are thinking..

Nice new look guys!! And a great Magazine.

Here's a quick one dear author & all you lovely ppl (Pls all to be taken in the light vein) - Just some laughter.
==============

ET opened a debate on "Is Premji right to go against job quotas in Wipro?" As expected most of the posts agree with him... here is someone who put his point in a very different way…… :-))
--------------------------------------------------------
I think we should have job reservations in all the fields. I completely support the PM and all the politicians for promoting this. Let's start the reservation with our cricket team. We should have 30 percent reservation for OBC, 20 percent for SC/ST, etc.

Cricket rules should be modified accordingly. The boundary circle should be reduced for an SC/ST player. The four hit by an OBC player should be considered as a six and a six hit by a OBC player should be counted as 8 runs. An OBC player scoring 60 runs should be declared as a century.

We should influence ICC and make rules so that the pace bowlers like Shoaib Akhtar should not bowl fast balls to our OBC player. Bowlers should bowl maximum speed of 80 kilometer per hour to an OBC player. Any delivery above this speed should be made illegal.

Also we should have reservation in Olympics. In the 100 meters race, an OBC player should be given a gold medal if he runs 80 meters.

There can be reservation in Government jobs also. Let's recruit SC/ST and OBC pilots for aircrafts which are carrying the ministers and politicians (that can really help the country.. )

Ensure that only SC/ST and OBC doctors do the operations for the ministers and other politicians. (Another way of saving the country..)

So, what do you think, huh???

==============
Love.

Thank You :) for that

Here's some more to make you think and smile

"Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for
your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried
in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a
good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like
every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars
to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about
him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,
why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both
dogs!

If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he
just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables,
what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call
it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?"

perhaps becasue an asteroid is trying to butt in into the butt of the celestial hemispheres from outside while the hemmorrhoid is already there (hemmed in) in our hemispheres at the bottom (of course we can cushion the effect by putting a gaddi below lol.)

God that was so hilarious Jasjit!

My favourite:

'Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?'

Harb that was hilarious. Couldn't stop laughing.The best scientific explanation we could have got for that one. lol

Hey Jas & all, you're good fun ppl. ... definitely making this li'l place ... an enjoyable one.

J - "Wow!" & ":)" ... some interesting & funny stuff indeed.

Love
:)