Wonderful post, Anusheh!

"If you want to use any tool effectively you have to learn to master it. The same principle applies to the mind."

No doubts about it.. it seems a human tragedy, that a child must grow up depraved of a natural nurishment, such as parent-love/affection/quality time...etc. Without it; creates a world of unhappy people..what have we done to ourselves? I am so much like A,,,it's creepy!

North

Dearest North

Thats a brave admission. And you should truly congratulate yourself for that because its only when we use the sharp sword of truth that transformation rides in as the shining warrior.

Truly not receiving love in childhood creates myriad distortions in our being which we spend the rest of our lives struggling with. I guess its the challenge that our soul brings with it, choosing who we are born to and under what circumstances, so that we can move further into the light. I just know one thing for certain. The challenges that come your way are not less than the courage and ability one has to also transcend those same challenges.

lots of love

Dear Anusheh,

‘positive obsessing’ - very critical point you have addressed and the lucidity with which you managed to explain it, is amazing!

The kind of examples you have given, make it very easy for us to pin point the obsessive nature in ourselves. Reading this piece reminded me of this friend, who sadly got entrapped in this thing called 'obsession' soon after she had a baby. Her endless saga of how she felt suffocated, how she couldnt work anymore, how she felt jealous of her husband going out in the world and meeting challenges while she had to stay home ..... so and so forth ....

I tried my best to get her to see all the good sides to her life, to remind her that the baby was a mutual decision, but gradually I realised that it was all quite in vain as she was so blocked in her head that she couldnt see reason. It was almost as if with vengeance that she refused to be happy!

Dear North,

Bravo! Half your battle is won already :)

Hi Surya,

So why arent you the king of those Sundays anymore? Work pressure?

Good Morning everyone!

Dear Anusheh,

You (and of course all others) make things simpler and easier to relate. This definitely affect the reader in a positive way.

Shubhosree, Anusheh, North:
Like in Part I, 'Buas' raised the a realisting difference between Determination & Obsession, I believe Obsession (like many virtues / vices) has many faces.

Our mind at first (in our childhood) is not quite capable of differentiating between the dark / bright faces of it. But with a little (external) guidance, if we can bring in that "Watching" in practice, we can really come out like well polished gems.

Not that age really matters for bringing those changes. But I'm sure we agree that learning is easier with Openness - a trait which I seem to be wanting to relate to the 'Youth of the Mind'.
The child in us is ever-ready to get in new things, is open to a change suggested by a stranger (stranger = anyone not really close).
If we feel we are open to changes, are flexible; then I think we've befriended our Young 'self'.
It definitely helps I know, from my experiences.

Dear Shubhosree,
Because now I sleep thru some of them (mostly):-P, and then playing with my brother's kids on others :-). Its amazing to see their energy, so I chill in this way - independent of the seasons - making it timeless.

Lots of Love :)

Dear Anusheh,

Thank you for another great post; lucid and helpful. amazing synchronicity, for all the last few posts on the blog have helped me so much. Like North, I felt the same - A's story was like watching myself in a mirror. Reading through this piece, and the earlier ones in the last week, one is able to recognize so many of the thought patterns that have and continue to create havoc, chaos within and manifest in behaviour every day.
Thank you dear!

Hi everyone - great stuff on the blog, and it continues to mesmerise me. Keep blogging!

love
Sukanya

Hi Sukanya,

Good to have you back :)

Thanks Shubhosree. Haven't really been away :-)
am on the blog everyday, reading, absorbing and working on my lessons. Only that I haven't been commenting! am still very much with the Clan (as Surya says elsewhere)...right here.. Assam, and Tagore, North's northern lights, connecting the dots, through the vertigo of thoughts to the edge of forever, learning...absorbing.. what a fascinating journey!

in gratitude & love

Hi Sukanya, North, Surya

Sukanya
Good to see you back. Are you back in Delhi?

Dear Sukanya

Like I said to North, bravo for the courage to be honest. Honesty to oneself is the most precious tool for wellbeing, taking us back into being the warriors of light that we forget we are. I guess at the end of the day healing is ultimately just a commitment to truth, our own, and through that of the entire universe.

love
a

Dear Shubhz

Thanks. It's sad but true that some people just dont want to break out of the misery. You just have to let them be then for your own sake and I guess for theirs too.

Dear Surya

You're absolutely right when you say that more important than age is the ability to be receptive. Its also true that we are more likely to listen to a stranger than someone we are familiar with. I guess because with the former there are no attachments and hence less suspicion.

love

Hey Shubhosree,

I understand how helpless one feels when one is unable to get a friend or close one, out of some loops. I hope she comes out of it. May be she will, once the baby is a li'l older (assuming its a new born/toddler).

And as Anusheh indicated, the best we can do is try once and leave it to them after that - without falling in the loop ourselves. :-)
And you did exactly the same. You are a good friend. :)

Hi Anusheh
I think you're guess is good about having lesser/no attachments with a stranger compared to someone we know closely.

Also, as I said about the many faces of Obsession and how a young mind can be guided well to 'Watch the Mind' to be able to identify the patterns / faces as they come. I must say that many of us (including me) also might identify with another kind that I recently found in myself: "Obsessive Planning".
I, in many ways relating to A too, used to plan a lot. But found it pretty funny & discouraging at the same time, that after all the planning, I ended up with some odd scenario (though not always but quite often) that got left out in the Planning stage.
I must say that it changed my way of working since I realised that I can never actually plan "everything". All I could do was to let it come, without fearing the "What if's?" and thinking like "Ok. Will look into a problem as/when it comes".

Hey Jasjit: How are you doing?

Hey Sukanya,
You'r so right when you talk abt so much in here to 'absorb'. There's a subtlety to your saying 'working on my lessons' :)

Love the Clan :-)

Hey Anusheh,

Yeah I guess its the obsession to be the victim.

Just thought I will share this ...

Saw IQBAL last evening (yeah I know its really late in the day but hey, better late than never!). And I couldnt help but notice the madness in Iqbal to learn the game, to better and better himself all the time. His persistence to get Naseeruddin Shah to get to coach him. His passion for the game. His craze to be a part of the Indian team. His perseverance and hardwork ...

Made me think that is this not an obsession? But I got my answer towards the end, when he was tempted by Girish Kannad (the coach of the opposite team) to let them win by offering him a chunk of money and promises to get him into the Indian team the following year.

And he declines the offer. He hadnt lost sight of his dreams but knew where to draw the line!

Brilliant movie that one! Three cheers to Nagesh Kukunoor! :)

Yeah Shubhosree. Good theme. Shows the fine line. (couldn't get to see the movie though :( ).

Also reminds me of Eklavya & Dronacharya though.
Pointing towards clarity & effort required to achieve a goal.

Thanks for sharing :)

Dear Surya,

Thanks :)

I guess its a pretty common obsession to have - planning for 'every' contingency possible. I know quite a few people (my dad being one of them) with the tendency to make sure they have every speck of detail chalked out. It can really drive the people around up the wall. And then no matter how much we try to explain to them that its not always possible, it doesnt work.

And now I understand why.... its their obsession and unless they see it the way it is, they will never get rid of it. I am glad you have identified it! :)

Hi Surya and Shubhz

Great points from both of you. Shubhz you really got it in Iqbal. I guess with obsessions you dont stop at anything to try and get what you want. Like A in the story lies compulsively to get what she wants....losing sight of right/wrong, values, etc.

Surya you hit the nail on the head. Thats what I meant when I said that obsessions are life negating. Because they dont allow for that unknown factor called 'life' which just happens and takes its own course regardless of the amount of effort and anxiety you put into it. Of course planning and effort are important but having done that and knowing that you have done your best you then also need to have the flexibility and courage to let life take its course and to be accepting of the outcome it offers you, knowing always that life by its very nature is not against you and so all outcomes are actually in your favor.

Hey Shubhosree, Anusheh,

THANK YOU! :)

Have already said enough; I guess its the place that makes people think out loud eh? ;)

With you guys, Ever ;)

Anusheh, thanks. You are right - ultimately it is commitment to truth - our own, and through that of our entire Universe.

Hi Jasjit. No I am not back yet, but should be in Delhi later this week. My sabbatical is progressing well; though very tough, and it has been draining, but I am feeling and experiencing the difference. Thank you lama.

Hey Surya, thanks.. there is just so much here that no matter how much one reads or absorbs there is always more to come back to..

love the clan.

its a scorching summer afternoon here in Bhubaneshwar, with so much of the green cover and woodlands gone! such beautiful greenery sacrificed for urbanization and development, it has changed the essence of this once beautiful balmy city of temples.. feel sad, having come back home after only about a year, to see the rapid changes.

Dear Anusheh,

At the outset congrats on the fascinating article.As i had mentioned in my first message on the blog, each article on the blog compells you to Think & Raise Yourself (TRY).Your observations as mentioned in the article was another

"Watching the mind is the first step to healing obsessive thought". How true. Its said "Mann Jitey Jag Jitey" (Master the mind and you will conquer the world).

Hey Shubhosree,Surya,Sukanya [wow so many 'S' to start with..btw u can count me in ur club as well my pet name being Shubho ;-)]

Interesting comments by you all.
Well i too have lots to share,meanwhile my boss is staring at me , so i better go. will be back soon. Hopefully tonight itself.
And ya Iqbal , that was a nice movie and a great interpretation shubhosree :-)

Dear Sukanya

What an important sabbatical, happening exactly in the city it needs to, in the right year at the right pace. Now if that is not what Garce is about then what??

I am glad the pieces here are helping your process. I guess it is really when we become open and receptive to something, we simply transfer it the power to guide us. And then it never lets us down. And that in a nutshell is what unified consciousness is about.

A few months back, I started on another blog (my first ever experience on blogging) taking with me the reverance I owed to its charismatic centre. Just being there set off a host of processes within me, chiselled some more stuff, sharpened the eye of truth and amongst other things gifted me the idea of this blog. A hugely 'populated' space it was also a marketplace so all kinds of people visited, ranted, jibed shared incredible vision and wisdom, fought and played games. But through it, until the point that I became inactive there and set up this space, I could not look at anything happening there as being outside of me or what I needed to learn/understand about me. And for me indeed it became just that- Grace and Divinity at play.
Reminds me of a favourite Kabir doha:
'yeh to ghar hai prem ka, khala ka ghar nahi
sees utarey bhuin dharey, to hi baithan payi.'
(When you enter the house of learning remember it is the house of love,not your aunty's home. For to be eligible to sit in the house of love you must disconnect that head you carry about filled with its unloving ego and set it on the ground.)

So as Surya mentioned receptivity being the key to learning/transforming/keeping our innocence intact- I have found that to be such an inviolable truth on my journey, over and over again.
Love and hugs

Hey Anusheh

i missed a line there..

Your observations made me think , analyze myself from the view point of Obsession !! and it was quite an enriching experience. And what did i discover ?? Not sure yet. Well thats the fun in learning , you can go on and on and still not reach a conclusion.

Thinking ;-)

Hi Shubho (Prasun)

Fitting pet name! great acronym TRY, love your takes on profundity through the simplest routes. Rare gift! Heard Sri Ravi Shankar being interviewed yesterady an he said a line I know you will love -"Know that you are very special but live like an ordinary man."

Love

Dear Jasjit

Its always a privilege to hear from you.Its inspiring !Know its been repeated umpteenth time,but that does not make it any less true.

"Know that you are very special but live like an ordinary man."
Thanks. Loved it and i also firmly believe in it.We are all Special.

At the same time i find an analogy between greatness and silence "The moment you say what you are,you are no longer there"

Hello Prasun

Thank you. I loved the acronym TRY. Great one. Haan bhaee we have all known/know obsessions. I used to be the Queen of obsessions at one time so I'm not out of the ring. Its only when you've been there that you can TRY:)

love

That is another amazing line/truth Prasun. Thanks for that.

Prasun

The line is truly profound and apt. Thank You for the love, light and wisdom you bring here just by being you.

Love and gratitude

Hey Prasun,

TRY - Good one again!

And about the Letter, Have heard a lot about those times and Tagore's contributions to the nation. Truely a legend and yet so ordinary. Fits the line from Jasjit - "Know that you are very special but live like an ordinary man."

Hey Jasjit,
Assume me with Prasun's words for you! :)

Hey Anusheh,
So its your experience that's lighting up so many lives eh!?? :)

Great to have you guys :)

Hey Prasun,

sorry not calling you SHUBHO as thats one of the many names that I am addressed with. I dont think we need to confuse people :-)

Hope your boss didnt have you for dinner!!

"Know that you are very special but live like an ordinary man."

That is so simple and yet so deep. Thanks Jasjit for sharing it. So ironic that feeling special is what we crave but, constantly looking for it from others, seeking it outside. And so difficult to know it and believe it from within. "Aham Brahmasmi" is a truth that, I guess, more than we can digest!

Hi Everyone

Ok for those interested Radhika is still alive! My first reaction aaaaaaarrrrrrrgggghhh! Why do women always end up sharing such stuff? My second reaction hey if it helps someone have good sex, why not:)

Anusheh, very simple and clear article. Really appreciate the clarity of thought and the ease with which you translate them. My obsession or fear is that I have now felt for a very long time that I am going to die in a car accident. This thought especially gets exacerbated if I am in a rush to get somewhere. What do you think it is? It can reach the point of obsessive thinking at times so it would help if you could shed some light. Thanks

Prasun,

forgot to add ...

- "The moment you say what you are,you are no longer there"

couldnt agree with you more!!

Jasjit, wow 'yeh to ghar hai prem ka, khala ka ghar nahi, sees utarey bhuin dharey, to hi baithan payi... thank you for the lovely Kabir doha, just what I needed..

Yes, it is Divine Grace and the great Play! Like the Mcdonald's line - I am loving it.. The last meditation exercise has been such a huge surprise, hard but amazing in what it is bringing up. I owe it all to the Grace having brought me to IFSHA and to you and the blog..my journey would never have started without it.. it has been fascinating.

Hi Prasun, great acronym TRY, so apt for us, and expresses the spirit that the blog brings to our lives every day..

love

Sukanya, you're most welcome.

Surya, are you being cheeky:)

Venkat, glad to hear Radhika is alive:) Bhaee women have a different way of expressing intimacy. Have you ever seen the Friends serial, this is happening constantly on it. The girls sharing intimate details and the boys going aaaarrrggghhh:)

As far as the fear goes Venkat, could be a childhood experience and if its nothing like that then could just be past life memory which needs to be resolved. Have you read Many Masters Many Lives by Brian Weiss. Get the book if you havent its quite fascinating and will help you understand what I mean.

Cheers

Hey Happy people!

Prasun loved your line!

Anusheh simplllly well done! Just loooooved your opening line. Brilliant! So I want to tell you about my crazy obsession. My mother is A control freak in the kitchen- cleaning, storage , which pot to cook what in, the fridge must be cleaned the same day every week- etc, etc. So we hated it, ran out when she came in, teased and often swore we would be the opposite in our homes.

So what I end up doing is the same. Everyone especially the maids hate me [i've lost a few to this mania]. Try to stop but just end up bursting into tears of frustration sometimes. When my mother visits her smug smile is the last straw. Help because it sure feels like hell.

Hey Anusheh,

When you said that you used to be the Queen of obsessions, it came out as a realization about where does all the wisdom comes from indeed.

My apologies if it indicated anything else :)

Regards

Anusheh please help Radhika. you will bring peace to our home in ways you can't imagine. :-]

No actually can't remember anything from childhood. Past life huh! Never thought about that but the book sounds fascinating so will read it. Thankx

Hey Jasjit. I remember that doha from school, for some reason Kabir was a favourite. But thanx for the meaning. A whole new light!

Did I thank you for that book list? Have started with Deepak Chopra's Seven Laws Of success. Let's see what it does for my corporate dreams & ambition!!!!!!

Hey all you bloggers. Its great to see so much wisdom & affection here. I'm loving it too.

Hey Anusheh,

what a great piece! so enriching to read everyone's comments here. and feels even better to see how people are admitting to their obsessions. i think thats commendable. 3 cheers to you anusheh!!! :)

and while we are at it, i would like to say that i concur with Radhika on how we try not to be like our mothers and end up becoming just that! my mother is sooooooo religious that she cant even step out of the house without finishing her daily rituals (which takes hours to finish). it never occured to me before, but after reading this piece i am beginning to realise that she is obsessed with rituals!!! and i have made it a point not to carry these things once i am married. but now that i hear Radhika's story, i feel i need to be extra careful and not fall into the trap myself!!! Thanks Radhika for the warning!!!

Hi Guys,

Radhika's comment reminds me of my Mom's earlier days too. She was a ditto. Had so many maids run off. Then when we talked about it, we decided to just let them make some mistakes if they leave an inch of uncleaned floor / utensil.
It seems to have helped, though she still shows that trait in some rare cases.

I think now I should let her be for a while :) and then may be get back to talk to her in a while.

Would love to know this though.
Best wishes - all :)

Hey Radhika!!

Good to see you are alive! :)

Now that you are conscious of it (the transferred obsession), I am sure you will be able to shut that self the moment it tries to even utter a word!

Hey Venkat!

Good luck with the book :)

Surya pal, I was just kidding....pulling your leg so to say. Of course you were right about what you said, I was just having some fun, sorry.

Thanks Radhika and Shalini (venkat you're so funny)

Okay yeah this one is a really scary one. Becoming your mother is a whole phenomenon someone needs to do an article on. But seriously this cleaning mania is something many women get trapped in. By the way is anyone here an aries (I mean out of these cleaning women) because they're literally born with jhadoos in their hand.

In womens lives particularly the mother is the central pattern that you have to step out of. Who she is and how she is, is who you become sexually, emotionally and behaviourally. Its quite scary but the need for validation from the mother and the identification with her as the feminine one needs to emulate ,seeps into ones being, creating all kinds of similar patterns and ways of being.

I've seen some scary cases during my work in IFSHA of girls who come in with huge issues with their mum but are actually mirror images of them. This need for validation can become one huge mess. Often what we think is totally not like our mother is in effect just a reaction to some self within her which has hurt/pained us. And in trying not to be like her or be like her we just play out the same pattern in different ways.

Hey Anusheh,

If you see my last comment abt this, I flashed a smiley at the end. I let it go the very moment I gave that out. So don't be 'sorry' buddy :) ... just remain - 'Anusheh'.

Surya

Surya youre a peach:) And thanks for the Tagore letter. He's one reason I would like to learn Bengali.

Dear Anusheh

Feel a little confused about the source. But you know the strange thing is that as I read your comment a strange sadness just came from nowhere. It must have something to do with her. Like why are my eyes filling up with tears right now. Well i should look for it I guess.

Thankx for your wisdom.

Dear Radhika

Perhaps its just a past which needs to be understood and released. Perhaps through tears. I hope you find the source and the compassion that you need for yourself and for her.

Big hug to you
love

Anusheh, your points and the perspective you share are great reminders and signposts on the way. Yes, tears wash away so much.. Bengali is such an amazing language, and such a huge repository of indigenous knowledge. I fell in love with Bengali as a child and it has only grown stronger with every passing year. Tagore and Sarat Chandra are absolute favourites. Sarat Chandra's women protagonists are mesmerising.

Venkat, Surya, Prasun,

You guys are a breath of fresh air, so different, funny and sensitive.

Shubhoshree, great points and succinct, always good to read your shares.

bless you all.
Radhika, you express issues that one is grappling with all the time. As I confront my fears and obsessions, my insecurities stemming from childhood for the first time, I wanted to share with you that tears come unbidden, and have helped me discard a bit of the baggage I've carried so long. There is sadness, and anguish, yet there are great moments of feeling free and soaring, of not being affected within. I am spending time alone with my parents after a very long time, and for the first time I don't feel pressured to be anything, anybody esp with my mother. There is a sense of calm and reconciliation, and in just being nothing, no one. I am around them, peaceful, quiet yet its like I am not there. Wonder if that makes sense.

Jasjit, Gibberish is such a great tool! Thank you.

Dear Anusheh, On another thread, Jasjit mentions how it amazes her I am aware, yet unable to walk out into the full light of "me."

I have been thinking on that; as it's been my wonder, or perhaps cursed path,,to reveal?

I've turned many stones here with you all, on the most interesting topics, I've been honoured to turn them stones "in." Ya'll have the uncanny ability; in swooping up the "fallen birdling" in unison..amazing!

Anyway, a thought of mine as I reflected on Jasjits comment to me; as it resonated so deeply,,i recognised at once...what she'd meant.

OK< my internal environment seems ok, right?

My external environments are not. I have had just about every sacred trust broken on me by others.

I have absolutely no palpable support system(never ever,,,did.)

So, now I am at that awaited-for crossroad..which direction to turn towards,,and I have done so, the past 2 years, significantly; especially this past year, and in most delightful ways! I think God knows, I need nothing less than feather-wing support.(smiles.)

But, if my mind is the main-frame; why can I not cross the street yet?

So, in lieu, I figure I have a wire somewhere, so attached to hell; it is afraid of heaven..because I am thirsty..and do not get,, a drop on the homefront per se..

So, how does a waterless rose grow? Parched.

How do I find that first drop of water; when the land(support system) is barren around me?

I have issues yet, to set free..so disturbing, it's hard to say it out loud? Why do I prefer to keep it as a hell?

IS it b/c this pain is all I've known since my birth; and without water, I parch?

North

Dear Anusheh,

absolutely agree with you when u said that obsessiveness is a result of unresolved emotional states.

these states I feel arise due to thwarted desires or as an outcome to see that the desires are fulfilled.

there is a wonderful example given by a saint from south India regarding desires, obsessiveness etc.

Ramana Maharshi said that we are like a person standing under a shade of a tree. desires induce us to go out of the shade to do work in the sun (fulfillment of desires). when desires are fulfilled we return back to the tree shade and be happy. persons having no desires obviously are pereniaaly in the shade and experience bliss.

persons in the heat run about here and there in order to fulfill thwarted desires and hence develop obsessions.

good morning to all. :)

Dearest North

To see and to integrate are two entirely different things. But to have the ability to see makes integration possible and powerful. There are many who just cannot/refuse to see and there is not much one can do there unfortunately.

Like you so eloquently put, a rose without water is parched. But the truth is North that we alone are the source of all nourishment for ourselves. The rose blooms within and the water for it must flow from within too. Life happens in a certain pattern to us repeatedly only to remind us that the flower within is unnourished.

A childhood without love is indeed a long and arid desert at our source and we spend a lifetime running away from that one truth. The cord that you feel is attached to hell is infact just the memory of that long unending desert which refuses to dissolve. Reacting from such an overwhelming memory all of our life becomes an endless struggle to grow new patches, nurture them, project the greenery that we need and then expect them to be the garden of our dreams.

However in truth, they always end up replaying the same arid patch because of one indelible truth. When the trigger for something in our lives, be it a relationship, work, religion, seeking kinship etc. is in response to a frightful, dark memory it will only trap us in the same cycle, for our fears reach there before we do.

That is why Dear North, the ONLY path to healing is to turn back, walk into the midst of that desert, know it, accept it with courage and clarity, lift up the self which is cowering in its midst, dust off its fear, show it the purpose of its feet, hold its hand firmly and teach it to walk out. And once that self has left you will never return. Then there are no triggers and that self is dead. Everything around you sprouts with the colors of abundance and all that you create comes not from projections but from the flow of your creative soul.

Just to humbly add, I only share the vision of what I have walked and for every step that I suggest to you I have known both its despair and its victory. The details of my past are meaningless here, all I want to say Dear North that had I not rescued my lost self the deserts of my past would have surely ended me, perhaps even my life.

With love fellow traveller

Good morning Aachi, we have been missing you:)

Thank you for bringing Ramana Maharishis beautiful words to this thread.

love

Dear Jasjit

"Thank You for the love, light and wisdom you bring here just by being you" . I am honoured !

Dear Shubhosree

Call me Prasun ;-)
And ya thankfully my boss didn't have me for dinner (though she invited me for it nonetheless)

Sukanya & Radhika
Fascinating posts ! and as surya had mentioned "keep them coming..its better that way"

Dear Anusheh
(or should i say Former Miss Queen Of Obsessions)
Good morning ;-)

Prasun you cheeky man!!! That was hilarious I really enjoyed it LOL

A big HI to all !!

I guess this blog is becoming life-threatening to many. I am glad to see Venkat didnt kill Radhika, Prasun's boss didnt have him for dinner ... lol

I guess we are all Survivors here!!!

Dear Prasun,

That was a lovely read. And so very true.

Dear Sukanya,

Thanks :)

Good to know that things are working out for you!

God bless :)

Hey Shubhosree

My boss' is not a HE....its a SHE ;-) (how can u miss that)

Okay guys its time to tell you about my obsessive phase. Anusheh I'm an ARIES (yeah I can see the smile on your face!). But to be truthful I'm not an obsessive cleaner, though I have an obsessive cleaning aries friend.

After my marriage I had taken a break and it was during that time that I became obsessive. Most of the time I used to be alone at home. I used to always worry about keeping er..the Kitchen er..clean. The victim of my obsessive behaviour was the kitchen exhaust fan. Would clean it every fortnight. But when I got back to working all this stopped (oops remembered haven't cleaned the exhaust for months now! Thats also not good :) )

Anusheh thanks for the article. I have to show it to someone very close to me. I would like to write about that person here but I want that person to read your article first. I'll try to make the person write on their own here.

Love
Chaitali

Dear Anusheh, you said: "I just know one thing for certain. The challenges that come your way are not less than the courage and ability one has to also transcend those same challenges."

I am counting on that very fact, Anusheh.

Dear Shubhosree..... thanks, I'm "changing" as fast as I can.

Well said, Surya!

Sukanya,,,, with you in spirit.

Hi to you too, Jasjit; I loved your reply, thankyou!

Dear Anusheh... your last post to my question was so brilliantly stated!! I understand more about myself now from your words, Anusheh... I cannot begin to express my appreciation for your professional, and natural born wisdom(smiles.)

North

Dear Prasun,

Go back and read it again. I never said that your boss is a 'HE'.

May be you need some sleep ;-D

Hey Chaitali,

That was funny! But I think it was more a case of 'idle mind'. And you are a cusp anyways :-)

Dear Smiles (north)

Thank you for your warmth and for providing the opportunity to flow:)

Chaitali

That was so funny. I bet you that fan is going to get a good cleaning this weekend:) Hope the person you refer to will benefit from the piece.

Hey Shubhosree

Opps sorry.
Mistake rectified .. the tables have turned (how cud i miss that)

I really need some sleep ;-)

Hi Prasun,

lol .... No sweat! :-)

Hello Friends :-)

JASJIT :)

Anusheh [Thanks :)]

Shubhosree [Chirpy & smily as always :)]

Prasun: Don't worry about the performance buddy - I'm sure just 'being' at IFSHA will be a beautiful experience [and much more ;-)]

Chaitali: Saw you finally :), and a nice share.

NORTH: You're very kind. Thanks :) Keep smiling

Aachi: Long time, buddy :)

Thankyou ALL for the great travel. Lot of comments to go thru. Will go thru them in Lunch perhaps and be back. :)

Hi there Surya (the sun came out a little late today eh?)! ;-)

Hey Surya have been busy with the next piece so couldn't board the bus earlier.

Shubhosree your'e right about my mind being a devil's workshop during that time. I only thank God that I was not getting into devilish activities ;) I don't know if I'm a cusp. The aries friend that I wrote about earlier... well we both share our B'days and she is a real cleanliness freak. She admits it too.

Anusheh did you have to remind me about the fan :(

Hey Shubhosree,

Just thought of making the beautiful chirpy morning a little longer :).

[Actually was a bit busy in office :-P ]
And well, my boss is a HE :(

Hey Chaitali,

Will wait for the piece.

Oops! Sorry guys, I meant to post it here. But
posted it on "A Sex Worker in Park Street" instead.

so here goes ....

A beautiful story that I came across and thought of sharing with all of you.... its called 'The Cup of Life'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A group of working adults got together to visit their University lecturer. The lecturer was happy to see them. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

The Lecturer just smiled and went to the kitchen to get an assortment of cups - some porcelain, some in plastic, some in glass, some plain looking and some looked rather expensive and exquisite.

The Lecturer offered his former students the cups to get drinks for themselves. When all the students had a cup in hand with water, the Lecturer spoke:

"If you noticed, all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal that you only want the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all you wanted was water, not the cup, but we unconsciously
went for the better cups."

"Just like in life, if Life is Water, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold/maintain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change."

"If we only concentrate on the cup, we won't have time to enjoy/taste the water in it."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

May be we should stop obsessing about the cup and focus on the water.

Cheers! :)

Good Evening everyone

Shubhosree read your story twice ;-),in the comments section of both the articles..and it felt doubly good.

Reminded me of a similar story.

"When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 Hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar . . . and the coffee.

A professor stood before his Philosophy class and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the
jar.
He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with an unanimous "yes."
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.
"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
"I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
"The golf balls are the important things - your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
"The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.
"The sand is everything else--the small stuff.
"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
"The same goes for life.
"If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.
"Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children.
"Take time to get medical checkups.
"Take your partner out to dinner.
"There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
"Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.
"Set your priorities. "The rest is just sand."
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked.
"It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a cup of coffee with a friend."

Hello Everyone

Shubz, Prasun, bravo! great stories. Prasun is it not amazing how so many words exist in the universe just floating around, waiting to fall into our field of thought, so we can weave strands of thought as the music of our hearts, through song, poetry and wise tales. Words which can light up a moment into eternity, which can set us on a sea of immense wonder and adventure. Words which shine like immortal road maps, as humanity heaves past them searching the high road.

And yet the same words have the power to set our hearts to stone, burn us up in the rage of hate, break us in a thousand painful ways and trap us in self-created hells. I wonder how often we think of the potency of words?

Perhaps that is why we sleep, to purge the self of their abuse, the silence which allows rest, so we can return every morning anew maybe a little more aware on whether to use them as seeds of beauty or as shards of glass.

Shubz and Shubho you have scattered some beautiful, wise words here. Thank You.

Shubhz I guess the post was meant for both places and that is exactly what happened. :-)

To share from my own bag of words a lovely Zen story which fits this thread perfectly
Two Zen monks (an old and young monk) were returning home to the monastry one evening when they came upon the river which was in spate. With no boat in sight they had just readied themself to wade through when they noticed a beautiful young woman crying by the side. The older monk asked the younger one to ignore her since their practice did not 'allow' any contact with a woman. the younger one however approached her and enquired. "I am afraid to cross the torrents alone and if I do not cross I will be stuck here alone at night."
The older man was already mid-stream when he turned back to notice that the younger monk was carrying the woman on his shoulders and following him. The old monk was enraged. when they got to the other side the monk set the woman down, bowed to her and followed his senior home.

They walked in silence for a while until the fuming monk could no longer contain himself." You have committed a grave error of Dharma. I shall have to report you to the Master," thundered the old monk.
"I am not sure what you refer to," enquired the younger monk innocently. "That woman," fumed the old man.

"Her? The one that I set down by the river bank so long ago. It seems you are still carrying her."

Dear Jasjit

Just amazing!I dont know how often people think of the potency of words..but one thing is for sure,i am compelled to think of how POTENT your wisdom & thoughts are. Just fascinating !

The Zen story was lovely.

Indeed i am proud to be a part of this blog. (feel like writing that on my CV)

"I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference"

Dear Prasun

For years my favourite lines too!
When words are not potent enough then only a hug will do. A warm hug to you fellow traveller on this maverick, crazy blog bus.

Love

Dear Jasjit,

Thanks !! Thanks !! Thanks !!

Shubho aka Prasun ;-)

P.S : Maverick & Crazy..sounds fun.

Dear Jasjit, Prasun, Shubhosree,

Great Shares, Fun to read. :)

Drive on ppl :).

Dear Jasjit,

Powerful story! Love it every time!!! :-)

And I guess you are right that my post was meant for both the places :-)

Hey Prasun (Shubho, Maverick, Crazy) :-)

Lovely post that one! Beautiful words. I think we all need these reminders every now and then...

Dear Anusheh
Very good angle of analysing the root cause of obsession.
I think it is absolutely true.
I have a question. Can an otherwise mentally strong person be obsessive? Or mentally weak persons are victim of that.
To me, it looks, this article will be very very useful to many, if the author explains a little more about the methodology of coming out of it.

Love & Safe journey
Buas

Dearest Buas

May all our journeys be safe and filled with love and wonder:) Thank you for your wishes. To answer your question, the point I think is not of a strong or weak mind being prone to obsession. But about how we define a strong or weak mind and ultimately it is about the quality of the mind. Hope that helps:)

Lots of love