And today the marvel of our times is that logging on takes us across times and space which were unimaginable once. Literally and metaphorically! Literally this blog is about South Asians and sexuality (Indians, Pakistanis, Sri Lankans, anyone) boundary neutral, accessible to all, anywhere, a mouse-click away. Metaphorically this could be a whole universe!. Men, women, pre and post pubescent, middle-aged, beyond age, gay, straight, undecided, married, single, celibate, asexed, mystified, mystical, spiritually chaste, and sexually wasted, we can make up the universe right here on this blog.

And of course there’s more. The fears and the compulsions that make us sexually who we are, the unspent desires, the unmet dreams, the hearts worn out from loving and leaving, the bodies tired from giving and not receiving, the minds which hate and mistrust all they view. The moments of magic, of surrender and completion, the music the poetry, the yearning and fantasy all ride the sexual omnibus. Bright and bouncy, spirited and wild, speeding through the myriad landscapes of joy and excitement, this bus is the weightier side of what we have known as our life.

Is it about sex then? Is life so centrally about sex? Media, advertising themes, messages, revenue world-wide, rate ‘sex’ as the hands down selling point. Sex sells! Anywhere, anytime, anyhow! It intrigues, excites, is the playing field of dream and fantasy and the infinite curiosity of people across age, gender, class and culture. Life, loving, being, connecting, separation, completion and isolation, is the grand drama of our lives with the sexual as the centre of gravity. But if that be so…

Why the silence? The sexual is never addressed centrally in growing up. Neither at school, nor at home! In fact growing up is solely in absentia of any informed, open, healthy and safe space where we can ask questions with impunity. Puberty is experienced by most as a shaky nightmare of chaos and confusion. While the silence around us is almost ominous, the slanted references annoying and the curiosity infernal. Add to that the sleazy touchy-feely incidents, serious child sexual abuse, porn magazines, scandalous mis representation of facts by precocious peers and you have a common sexual root. Diffident, often aggressive, guilt ridden, scientifically illiterate, in-confident and twisted into odd standards of masculinity and femininity. This very root, then watered by morality, religion, cyber porn, aggressive relationships and pop versions of ‘sexy’ leave us all with a centre which is fairly unresolved if not outright mortified.

Even today, when in India, the sexual carousel is playing far more hip music, allows body longings to ride and sing quite unabashedly in public, when the young (across classes) date with a vengeance and extra, pre and post affairs are themes of ‘homely’ family soaps, the chaos just seems to be greater. Parents, school and college authorities take turns to be vexed, angry and often threatening. The young respond with rebellion but are plainly ‘miffed’ that they are not being understood. Someone brings in religious edicts and wants to throw a mouldy book at it all. And no one seems to know where and how to begin talking about it.

Blogging, is the newest realm of cyber communication. Still to catch on in South Asia, it has transformed the west by its potential to allow serious, intense, sensitive and friendly communication. In the silent, anonymity of our keyboard and monitor we can pour out our deepest angst and hidden fears. We can laugh together, share pain, light, wisdom and maybe find release from our real and imaginary demons. We can learn to listen and to speak about all that we love and fight, we can offer hope and inspire courage. This blog is indeed a space with infinite potential. Open and malleable to sculpting a community that can think, share, support, laugh and grow together. A place for vexed parents to share their confusions and really hear and learn from what the young want and say on this blog. A space for the young to understand who and what they are and want to be when they ask the question: who am I sexually? A space for single men and women wondering about warm, nurturing intimacy outside the realms of institutions and traditions, gay men and women caught in self-defeating denial and reacting, for men, women and children damaged by the violence and aggression of someone else’s sexual dark side, for wisdom of the heart and the spirit which brings together all that seems split and insurmountable.

And of course we also live in the land mass of Shiva and Shakti. The veritable Ardhnareeswaran, immortalized in the dance of orgiastic union and completion. For if, as the Vedas rule, the sexual is indeed the root of the spiritual, maybe we can discover it too as the mystical route of promise that it is: to ourselves and the great beyond.