Obviously! ; - )

thanks to wheels-within-wheels nature of scheme of thing of evolution, there are animals in human skins and there are humans in animal skins...those who are at the level of the big bulges will have big buldges and those who are at the level of big (fore)heads will have big (fore)heads. same goes for big and small breasts. one must be proud of oneself whatever way one is because every brick has been put by nature/evolution where it belongs and from where it can and will move forth on its journey of evolution.

Hi Rohit.

Harbji Jasjit and I were just recalling this program today we saw a while ago of these men and women who were through surgery and tattoos transforming themselves into animals. There was cat man, leopard man, lizard man and God knows what else. Cat man had surgically had whiskers put into his face and tatooed cat marks all over his body, had a tail inserted, his moouth restructured so it looked like a cat and what not. Same for all the others.

We were actually discussing today whether doing something like that is actually resolving a karma or creating another one where you will take on the form of that animal in your next manifestation. Looks like you heard the entire conversation! What are your comments on this.

Posts like these are very important to repeat in a world obsessed with silly body 'size' issues. And yet I have a friend my generation imagine who went to the U.S for her post graduation and has just had a breast implant. I mean she was over the moon because she would go on about how flat chested she was in college. And yeah we would rile her by joking about it but to think she would go this far and mess up with her body. So I don't know how modern people go down these roads but man its a fact.

Thanx for a gr8 post

Hi Shagufta

I wouldnt be surprised if everyone knows at least one person who has undergone plastic surgery of some kind. I for one know more than one woman who has put herself under the knife for a face lift, another for an ear tuck, another for liposuction (removing fat) etc.

Personally I feel so revolted by the idea of changing any part of my body that I can understand how desperate the need for validation has to be in these women (and men) to want to have themselves cut up.

Hi Guys!

Harb I'm in total agreement with you.

I feel very angry when I hear that people went through plastic surgery to restructure parts of their body which are already in good shape and health. I mean Plastic Surgery is meant for people who have severly distorted body- like when people get burnt, or have an accident, or have a defective body part from birth. To undergo Plastic surgery to have a straight nose from a blunt one, or to take ones smile up till ones eyes, or enlarge the eyes, become a breast size 38 from 28... Oof it's so infuriating!

Since many men are obsessed with penis size do they undergo surgery to have a bigger size or do they have chest hair implant to make up for the supposed 'loss'?

Like stop all this stupid time pass things and get real! There is much more to life people!

well sorry what woman like in men is the dick and what men like about women is her breasts
:( . thats why women are worried and men are tensed

well sorry to say the breasts are most sensual but i like those natural breats , the gifts of mother nature to women . sorry . but it isnt a compulsion . i love women the way they are . i loove them for being sensitive and a never die spirit . i read in one of the books and heard it how women are going on and on with their life . i dont need just their body , i need their mind and soul . in christianity we are told we each human beings are unique creation of God , that bodies are temple of God . so you people shouldnt worry . i am also worried . but i will keep on going . i will stop worrying .

Hi Dudecool

Well I dont know if its true that all women want men's penis to be a certain way and all men want women to have certain kinds of breasts but what is true is that certain stereotypes have been created which are today being subscribed to by a lot of men and women and creating a lot of angst in them with regard to their own body image. If there is to be a change in this we have to first begin with being comfortable with our own bodies.
And like you rightly say there is so much more to being man/woman.

Who teaches body love? In our culture sexual organs are for shame not love or pride. How to like or know your body in such environment? It is imposible.

I absolutely agree with Kalam...you have hit the nail right on its head, in India we are made to look at our sexual organs with shame, rather than just any other organs. I think it is very important to change this mentality. Once we overcome this, everyone would be comfortable with one's form.
And it also has been rightly pointed out that there is MUCH more to a man - woman relationship than just beautiful assets

Hi Kalam, Hello Chet,

By questioning why sexual organs are considered as a shame in India (or as a matter of fact in many other countries and cultures)we have already made a great start towards making the impossible possible.

Great going guys!

I think that attraction cannever be analysed by looking at sufercial things like externalbody parts i mean maybe thay are important but a lot of things apart from that like the way a person walks the way he talks the way he conducts himself everything contributes to make the final image.Looking for some comments on this

Hi Sayan,

There is an article on this blog by Aachi Mithin called 'Beautiful Feminine'. Why don't you go through that. People have spoken there about the point that you have made here.

Hi Sayan

You're absolutely right. There is so much more to a person than just their looks. Personally I have always found that the most good looking men/women can begin to look really unattractive if they don't have a nice personality. People dont seem to realise that beauty is really ephemeral and superficial. Who you are - your values, your conduct etc. is what defines you really. In relationships, personality and friendship of thought is what really matters at the end of the day.

Hi Guys,

Yeah Sayan, Anusheh true about what you say.

Many of my friends- girls and boys are looking for a mate for marriage. They are doing it by the latest trend wherein parents introduce the two people first and rest leave it on the girl and boy to decide whether they like each other or not. Now even in this method of mate selection photo of the proposed groom/bride needs to be viewed by either party (generally it is the bride's family who has to show their daughter's pic first. If the groom's party likes it only then will they send a priced pic of the boy.)

Anyway I have seen both my guy friends and girl friends 'rejecting' the proposal because they don't like the look of the person. Here's a skewed form of modernity yet again. While a tiny headway has been made wherein the boy and the girl are allowed to exercise their choice but they are still trudging along the same old path where physical appearance still sets the yardstick for choosing a mate.

I keep telling my friends that com'on just meet the person first and then decide on the basis of his/her behaviour whether you are interested in going further or not.

But I have also seen a reverse of this. Some of my boyfriends have 'rejected' the girl because she is... hold your breath... 'too pretty and smart'. Their argument is that beautiful girls are high headed, careeristic, snobs, they will create tension in the house etc. etc.

Com'on people! I think it's high time we stop judging people by their looks. For all you know the plain Jane or John who you choose might be equally nasty/a great person as the beautiful dove eyed fair damsel or the tall, wicked jawed, chisel faced clean shaven executive of a top MNC!!!!

As the famous song goes-
Dil ko dekho Chehra na dekho,
Chehre ne lakho ko loota,
Dil Sacha aur Chehra Jhoota
Dil Sacha aur Chehra Jhootaaaaa.

Before posting my comment i would like to thank anusheh and annie for agreeing with me on this issue.I would like to ask annie as to whether his friends have a very strict rule of what actually consists attractiveness.Did your friends go with the societal norms of beauty like tall,fair etc or each one has a different construct of what exactly beautyis .Maybe in the scenarion of arranged marriage the concept holds true,but in love marriages i know many who just told that attraction just happens.Yes in todays materialistic times also the apparent importance of iim iit notwithstanding people still just fall in love.Maybe like what anusheh told call it persionality call it what ever it just happens.

Hi Sayan,

Yes everyone has their own notion of beauty. What I am trying to say is that we cannot judge a person by his/her photo. Afterall Photo only captures the physical beauty of a person. One cannot get to know the non-physical beauty of a person through a photo. And who knows perhaps the photo of the person that was rejected contained the very 'beauty' that one is looking for in one's partner!

But there are many guys and girls these days who go for this new type of arranged love marriage (one can call this a sort of hybrid variety which suits the convenience of everybody(Yes we Indians are great at finding middle-paths... Hum aise bhi hain hum waise bhi... :) ) and yes their notion of beauty is not limited to looks but to other qualities in a person.

I guess when one is looking for love then looks don't really matter.

Actually in the process of discussion maybe i think that indeed we have come a little bit away from the main point of discussion that is body love.I think the primal reason for todays generation not to feel proud of their appearence is 1)Due to media and 2)Allpervasive insecurity.Coming to the first factor that is of media the set concepts of beauty are magnified each and evry time,you open your tv.I remember seeing an ad where a dark girl goes with his dad to a beauty parlour only to be told that she is too dark to be treated by them.The dad comes back tries his own therapy and eventually the girl becomes fair.Now what is the underlying message to the audience,apart from obviously glorifying the companys name,everyone can be beautiful if he or she has cetain key attributes fair skin,long black hair etc.Now my question who are these people to decide what exactly beauty is? do they have patent or something,to understand and tell people that ok this beauty and that is ugly.Anusheh is absolutely right that this type of sublimimnal messages are making people so insecure that people go to absurd heights like breast implantation, and all.Second thing that i think adds to this problem is the mental insecurity that is such a part and parcel of todays generation.Set concepts of success in life like iit iim combination are posing a tremendous problem for people who are not talented in those areas,add
to it the peer pressure to conform to a particular set of values either you are in if you follow or you are out if you dont.Now this type of choices are seen for the first time in india.You go through any american movie you can uderstand the underlying tension among the students to be the prom queen or to be the most popular.Thus i think this insecurity that is pervasive in all sectors of life has just crept in our body beauty concept.Nothing to feel astonished it was inevitable.

Hi Sayan

It is indeed a vicious cycle. The advertising world is equally responsible for creating and promoting stereotypes for men and women. And then of course there is peer pressure like you rightly say. However, I do believe that the biggest crisis underlying all these notions is a lack of individuality. Until we don't see ourselves as unique and special, everyone can have a field day with us.

Hi Anusheh,

I totally agree with u, I have been reading you people discussions.

One should have confidence in himself, and just not get influenced by other's personality

Hi Anusheh

Well a very interesting article and I do agree with you on the fact that one has to be confident about his or her body.

I would just like to question one of the bloggers here... Ms. Shagufta

The situtation is so that most of them get intimidated by societal or media norms or norms of nomenclature devised by that time. I think its not just this era when we are witnessing body torture to fit in the society. In 16th century women had to wear metal corsets to make their waists look thin as well.

So agreed most of people are not very sure about their bodies and to them someone else's opinion matters...

Now the question is what are we doing to let them have a high self esteem? ..... Was that ok to make fun of your friend when u guys did during college times for her being flat chested ....? Do you think that your constant strikes on her flat chestedness wouldnt have put her through inferiority complex? .... when you are acutely suffering from inferiority complex and you have come to a stage where comments doesnt matter anymore.. where you are so sure that your body is just not right and it has flaws....is it wrong to get a transplant .... cuz i think you are still not happy with her first you didnt like flatchested now you dont like with big boobs as you think it was an overrated act... So how should these weak people deal with people like you?
...... Sorry if I am offending you but really I want to know your side of perspective.