Great piece Chaitali!

"It will mean exposing the demand behind ‘paid sex’, which has been left undisturbed by moralists, and hence lay bare the vainness of pegging morality on the woman’s body."

This is indeed an aspect that needs serious attention. Why is the 'demand' aspect not pointed out in this issue? I guess it is always easier to blame someone else rather than look within ...

Without being or even sounding offensive, I've always wondered about the difference between paid and normal sex.
Is hitting a bar and pulling for a one night stand normal sex?

Dear Rajiv,

Let me reflect on that a bit and get back to you with my thoughts on that :)

Shubhosree,

In some of the countries where prostitution has been legalised it is held that since men's demand for sex can't be 'cured' and is an inevitable part of their sexuality, it is no use trying to dwell on the matter. The violence in prostitution can never be stopped if we don't address it's roots. Sexualities need to be understood and healed.

Hi everyone. Chaitali, interesting piece.

Rajiv, I think the main difference between those kinds of sex would be that there's really no concept of choice or desire as far as paid sex is concerned. In that sense its the money which is consensual, neither the attraction nor the interest. In one night stands on the other hand, whatever your reasons may be, you choose the sex.

On the other hand, as is often made a case, many marriages can act as paid sex when the marriage is a matter of convenience rather than interest.

Hey Chaitali! That was quite an eye-opener...

HI Anusheh, i had some thoughts related to what you said about 'paid sex' and normal sex (please correct me if i am off the mark here). what about the prostitutes who choose to be in this profession (could be for financial reasons) and also the young girls in big cities who get into these things just to earn fast money - would you say there is no 'choice' or 'desire' here? wouldnt it be 'paid sex' with choice? and isnt sex without choice or desire, rape? if so, then shouldnt the entire system of prostitution be stopped for the simple reason that it is nothing but rape?

Hi Shalini

The question of stopping prostitution does not arise because it continues to be the oldest profession in the world and exists wherever man exists. And even though civil society in the 21st century, considers prostitution to be an outrage against humanity, women, choice etc. neither criminalisation of it, banning, nor de-criminalisation is getting rid of prostitution. So somewhere we all need to seek an answer in why it continues to be an integral part of human being's collective desire.

As far as choice goes it needs to be looked at in the larger context of if they had another option to get the money they needed. And why does it continue to be that womens bodies are one of their highest marketable assets. For as long as thats true, whether they cash in on it or somebody else does, the question is that the marketplace stll places a higher value on their body than their being. And therein lies the answer.

Thanks Anusheh for responding to Rajiv's and Shalini's queries. Why do people pay for sex and why do people sell their bodies for sex are the larger questions that we need to understand because therein lies the whole exploitation that goes on in prostitution.

Why does one's 'social standing' have to decide whether he/she has access to basic human rights?

Great Post Chaitali

The larger politics at work on sexuality I feel, always reflects the the deeper morals we carry within. For instance the more potent question which tags protitution is always how every period in history has always condemned the woman who sells sex and not the man who buys it. The only commodity where the seller is 'immoral' and the buyer a faceless man. Or is he? Do you think its because every lawyer, judge, 'morality keeper' has largely 'known' as a man that a sex worker is somewhere not too far from being his fantasy and perhaps many have used them too. So the 'buyer' has his 'compassion' because he sees in him the 'erring' self he too carries or worse perhaps he secretly envies his 'bravado' at living out that need/fantasy.

This basic fact has never been resolved has it?

On the other hand women too have judged the sex worker eternally. Why? perhaps because they too have known that she exists as the fantasy that the wife can never be. In her head she is both the threat and the 'other woman' who will never go away. No wonder women have equally joined ranks with men to cast aspersions on the 'sex worker' and tie her to the stake so to speak.

Finally I guess what relly counts is what goes on inside our heads. If we were truly honest with ourselves then perhaps the real question is- that all of us liberal/modern as we see ourself- if we were to encounter a woman at a party who openly says she is a sex worker what is the thought(s) that races through us? Similarly if a friend(male)in a moment of bravado shares with us how his initiation into sex was with a 'sex worker' to help him overcome his sexual timidity what would go through our heads then?

In the answer lies the dichotomy of the world assigned to the sellers of sex and the alternate world view of its buyers. From our individual thoughts spin out the comuunity/group/legal/political/moral world view that we know as our world. This is a deeper question I feel. It has little do with the 'prostitute' and more to do with what 'selling your body for sex' defines to us as 'sexuality' both individually and as a society. I feel nothing else brings home our convoluted views/feelings about sexuality than the existence of prostitution and the various socio-political responses that we have had through time.

Perhaps it is time we all look at where the question really lies. I wonder what others think?

Sorry forgot to add that the AIDS debate converging on sex workers as the 'source ' of the epidemic and how to stop and 'contain them', fighting their criminilization on the one hand as a solution and on the other hand Uncle Bush's impeccable keyhole approach on 'ban them or else' are all symtomatic of the same confusion I feel.

Unless we are able to resolve the dilemma within us, understand it as our concept of 'sexuality' rather than 'prostitution' we can never resolve any of these matters judiciously.

Chaitali and Jasjit

Pertinent and thought provoking questions. I completely agree that basic human rights should have nothing to do with which profession you belong to. I also feel that Jasjit you're absolutely right in saying that we all carry this divide within us which looks at buyers of sex and sellers of sex (men and women) so differently. Men are completely indulged by us/society in their 'need' to visit a prostitute as a rite of masculinity, sexual potency,sexual initiation or just because their sexual needs are acknowledged and understood by society. And yet the women who make it all possible for them are treated like the worst garbage. How ironical is that.

Truly the answers lie within, just as the questions do too.

"understand it as our concept of 'sexuality' rather than 'prostitution'"

so true Jasjit!

Dear Anusheh,

Hi! Thanks for the response. I guess you are right. and the last line you wrote got me thinking ...."the question is that the marketplace stll places a higher value on their body than their being. And therein lies the answer."

food for thought! thanks

Hi everyone :-)

Hi Chaitali,

What a strange law coming from a nation that prides in giving everyone equal opportunity and freedom of speech!

Jasjit,

"This basic fact has never been resolved has it?" It's almost like a conspiracy between the actual buyers and the potential buyers to camouflage the convulated sexualities. The shield that is used is the sex worker.

A couple of years back I had seen this programme on NDTV where they had shown this village in Rajasthan where women had to 'sell' there bodies to feed the hungry mouths at home. I saw this programme when I was having my dinner. It ditressed me so much that I couldn't eat my dinner. I don't know what would go on in my head if I met a woman who was a sex worker but I have to say that it takes a lot of will power to do what these women have been doing.

If a male friend expressed his 'bravado' to me I would give him the address of this blog!!!

Dear Chaitali

Kudos on that very informative piece.Needless to say it was very well researched !

Frankly i am not much aware of the prevailing laws on the matter.So pardon my ignorance. Few doubts cropped up after reading the article.

"...many countries, especially in Southeast Asia, are faced with the dilemma of whether to forgo funds or sign a statement opposing prostitution even if it goes against their human right’s initiatives.." I wanted to basically know what is the standpoint of Indian Legal system on the issue of Prostitution. I mean what difference will it make even if we sign the statement, coz by not legalising prostitution in the first place we are already a party to the concept of opposing prostitution.Dont you think so?

Well as regards US (the so called Harbinger of an Ideal world) trying to play the "Big Brother" role, the lesser said the better. And the tricky situation is that the developing countries can't do without the funds as well :-(

Prasun,

India's Immoral Traffic Prevention Act (ITPA) prohibits the trafficking of human beings and forced prostitution. Prostitution itself is technically not illegal. Anyone over the age of 18 engaging in prostitution of her own will, and not in public areas, is theoretically protected. But in fact, sex work is criminalized because every act required to carry out prostitution is characterized as a crime by Indian law. The ITPA punishes anyone maintaining a brothel or living off the earnings of a prostitute. Moreover, police are allowed to conduct raids on brothels without a warrant based on the mere belief that an offense under the ITPA is being committed on the premises. The law also penalizes anyone who solicits or seduces for the purpose of prostitution, or who carries on prostitution near public places.

If organisations working with prostitutes sign the statement then they will have to withdraw the services that they give to prostitutes/sex workers, such as distributing condoms or sex education to have safe sex, advocacy work which involves developing self-help groups through which sex workers can fight for their rights. The reason being under the wordings of the US law these would be equivalent to 'promoting' prostitution.

In the Indian law nothing is stopping organisation from providing these services.

Hey Chaitali

Thanks for the info.It was an eye-opener.The whole issue's getting a lot more clear now.

But i must say ,there are a lot of grey areas rather loop-holes in the Act which can lead to a lot of harassment and in fact that is what's happening as well.

Just hoping India doen't sign the Statement and give in to US's big bully tactics.

Thanks once again.

Chaitali

Great post! Another reason for me to breath fire on Bushspeak and the hideous hypocricy of the U.S.
I mean singularly they contribute to world violence and tout nuclear responsibility to us amongst other things and now this. And of course now we too kowtow to them! I just hope other countries have more sense than to accept this crap and take Brazil's stand. But with all that money at stake will they ???

I agree Jasjit.. that is the basic question. But who has the courage or the seriousness to even address it. I mean outside this blog I don't see anyone bringing clarity to any of this. Last year my company had a brainstorming on funding socially relevant issues. Of course AIDs was the priority and then everyone agreed we should look for groups working with sex workers. I was really uncomfortable with the premise that they were the key source of HIV and made a weak protest. But then Chaitali I did not have your post to quote :)

Well Jasjit at least you are making us ask ourselves the fundamental questions and all I can say is that its all making a huge difference to me

Hi Surya, Aachi, Prasun, Shubhosree, Sangeeta, Sukanya, Rajiv, Anusheh, North, Rohit. Happy Holi guys and what's everyone planning for the wild day??? Bhang anyone?

Hi Prasun, Venkat

You are welcome prasun. I don't know if I would call them loop-holes or deliberate attmepts to corner prostitutes/sex-workers.

Hey Venkat,

I hope your organisation takes up more such work.

Well... the sudden change in weather is making me change my mind of whether to play holi or not. Lets see. Perhaps a little. Bhang!!!!! No way. Had two funny experiences after having bhang. Don't think I want to repeat it. But one never knows ;)

To all on the blog and to your families Have a great Holi and don't be naughty :)

Love
Chaitali

Hi Venkat,

It seems you are mentioning my name even when i'm not much active here. ; - )

Holi passed now & i did nothing special.

Anyway, Very interesting discussion here and dear jasjit & anusheh, can i do anything for the organisation? ; - )

Cheers, Rohit

Dear Chaitali....

I absolutley loved the title! :)

wonderful piece. Your knowledge and analysis of the scenario is again great.

I hate it when USA dictates terms to other countries and this law also is one in a long list of things that needs a serious rechecking.

Dear Rohit

Thanks for the kind offer. Knowing you are there to help is a gift in itself. Will give you a shout for sure when the time comes. thanks again friend. :-)

Dearest Jasjit

Make sure you don't forget me when you shout :-)

"This life of Ours is a Gift from HIM..What we do with it is our Gift to HIM"

Love
Prasun

Hi Rohit

Thanks so much for the offer. It's wonderful to know there is so much support for us:)

Dear Prasun

How can I forget those who become part of my world as the rememberance of things past and the prophecy of things to come. Each one of us has been there in the giant continum of infinity, meeting and separating to meet yet again. And now, the net creates our virtual reality of sorts, mirroring the great space called 'infinite potential' and once again we all collide as synchronicity weaves a web of shared wisdom, touching words and abundant affection. And this blog becomes a fascinating meeting point.
Yes indeed Life is Beautiful !
:-)