Much is being imagined, concocted and fanstasized around this great fairy tale. And since all is ultimately a sign of the times, I guess hands down we can say that the Big B family is the ultimate first family for India (sigh…what a sorry state of icons) and Ashwariya still reigning as India’s most beautiful face. Abhishek the gentle loser-with-untapped- potential exudes the grace and breeding of Big B and continues to flop as an actor and still win hearts and hope with the shiny halo of a famous family tree.

So what do I want to say about it all? Oh! Just make some interesting observations on what is actually the writing on the wall. Just in case some of you have missed it.

Like things have changed for women haven’t they. Ash, is a woman with a high profile past which includes a controversial and violent relationship with Salman Khan and a furtive liaison with Viveik Oberoi. But the good thing is all that matters today is that Ashwairya Rai, the most ‘beautiful’ woman in the world is tying the knot with Abhishek Bachchan, recently hailed the most ‘sexy’ man by a UK poll. And from the first family too to top it all, the heir of Bollywood’s (perhaps India’s) first family, son of Big B, and the equally daunting Jaya Bhaduri. What an ideal/perfect match they make- beauty and brawn, power and fame, money and name etc, etc. Reminiscent somewhat of the stir Charles and Diana made in the first innocent moments of their coupledom. Yes siree, given the international fame of Amitabh and even Ash this could easily turn into the most glamourous event of 2007!

But none of it has been smooth. There has been a price to bring together this Jodi No. 1. Kundalis (Horoscope) have been matched for what seems like over two yeas, visits to temples, shrines and dargahs; family pujas, hawans and darshans to ward off and appease the Rahus and Shanis (planetary influences said to cause problem in a person’s life, love etc.) that seemed to have interfered, influenced and created problems in Ash’s love life so far. No planet…. err….stone has been left unturned by the Bachchan clan and by Ash herself to tame the ill-fated ‘kuja dosha’ ( negative element) that rules her birth chart.

For the media of course all this has been the big event for their TRPs. Nauseating programmes are being aired discussing the details of Aishwarya’s horoscope, her ‘gunas’ (positive qualities) and ‘doshas’ (negative qualities), her personality and characteristics, what should her ideal match be like etc. etc.

Media has taken upon itself to decide whether the Ash-Abhi Jodi will be a hit or a flop. NDTV went on to interview inconspicuous media personalities asking them to comment on whether this would be a successful pair in real life unlike their unsuccessful pairing on reel life! Even before this young couple has got married channels are airing programmes on successful and unsuccessful celeb marriages in Bollywood.

They have decided to see if these two highly successful actors will be able to sustain their marriage like their earlier generation. In all this media has even taken the onus to define what comprises a happy marriage! For them Amitabh and Jaya are in a happy marriage. Not to forget that this is after all the hulla-balloo that the media made a few years ago (and has done before also) about the long-term affair between Amitabh and Rekha (yup the well-known secret) throwing doubts on whether Amitabh’s and Jaya’s is a happy marriage or a marriage of convenience after all. So to the media a happy marriage is one where the couple live under the same roof bound by the institution of marriage irrespective of whether any love exists between them or not. That’s a great example of a happy marriage (pun intended) the media is giving to its viewers!

For the fashion and entertainment world Aishwarya and the Bachchan trio combo is a jackpot, a treasure chest that will bring them Rs. 700 crore worth mullah. Designers and the ad world are all excited and anxious to bag this expensive package deal.

The Bachchan family decides to be oblivious to the media reports and continues to do their bit in affirming that every protection and every auspicious step is taken (just for precaution!) before a woman with a not so picturesque past (when it comes to intimate relationships) joins their happening family.

Barring the media which is on its own frenzied trip of cashing in on this event and taking on the Big Brother role of setting universal agendas for all, what is all this drama involving beauty, glamour, relationships, marriage, planets and rituals telling us? A twisted tale of the modern times…

On the one hand, past affairs (even violent and highly public ones at that) are no longer a block to a woman’s eligibility as a ‘propah’ bride for ‘fancy’ families. And on the other hand is a whole realm of superstition/desperation, to woo wonky planets and disapproving star charts.

Like the tragic Di (remember pre-marital her virginity tests???) whose life was a mish-mash of contradictions which finally turned the fairytale into a gothic horror story. One wonders why all beauty and fame comes equipped with its own brand of shadows. A Miss World whose beauty is extolled by people on both sides of the globe, carries the (worst possible curse for Indian women) of being a Manglik, that is if you are traditional and believe in charts, pre-destiny and all that goes along with it. Any manglik (man /woman) will bring much ill-luck to their partners and may also be the cause of their death. Eeeks! Imagine if an Indian bride is proved to be astrologically linked to her husband’s destruction and death- nothing short of murder no! The men usually continue to marry until one of the wives survive. The safest option being usually offered by astrologers is that both should be mangliks. That way if worse comes to worse they will just wipe each other out.

So as this tale of absurdity gets spun out …the world’s most beautiful woman, soought after, rich, famous, successful etc begins a long track of absurd perambulations around ill/good luck to erase her rather foreboding shadow. Word has it that Mama Bachchan is quite a towering presence in Baby B’s life and he neither signs films nor girl-friends without her explicit approval. And she is also pivotal in contacting hi-powered astrologers (have you noticed the numerous rings that both the male Bachchans adorn??) to ward off bad financial times, sagging careers, etc etc. Naturally she spent quality money on finding the best ‘spiritual terminators’ to neutralize all galactic attacks ever possible on her family and her beloved son. That’s fine!

However the million dollar question is what does this do to Aishwarya’s self-esteem? Is hers merely the oversight of one desperate to bag an eligible match? Well if that’s how desperate the world’s most beautiful woman gets what is she telling all of us???

In all this drama that which is common in all the participants, whether it is the Bachchans or Aishwarya Rai, is fear. The fearful self is not ready to take responsibility of its own life events. Instead it is looking outside for assistance. It is afraid to look into its own emotions, aspirations and feelings fearing that they will ultimately reveal their inner fears, insecurities and other emotions, which are very different from what they portray to the world outside.

Rituals, hawans etc. might be able to calm the fearful mind for a while but not forever. They work like tranquilizing pills but once their effect wears off old patterns resurface bringing back the same fears, doubts and panic. To reassure the mind you once again pop a pill which again wears of and this continues. So you end up living a whole life of fear and panic on the one hand and worse you hide all this behind a smiling face, glamour and beauty and so called happy marriage/relationship.

Will Ash and Abhi make it or not? Will their marriage work or not? Will Abhishek’s career take a dip like Viveik Oberoi’s under Aishwarya’s influence etc etc. These are not the question for us here. The question is how would we like to live our life? In constant fear and panic? Putting an artificial front to the world saying all is well whereas behind it you are nothing but angry and insecure? Indulging in rituals mindlessly instead of tabbing on to their guiding forces, which are meant to show us the path of freeing ourselves from the fears that we hold on to?

To love and be loved is something that everybody wants. But we have to decide whether this love should have its roots in fear or in freedom. What do you say?